Save Your Smiles
by blaircow
Summary: An angsty story between Sakura and Kakashi throughout the many years they have known each other. Through, life, pain, and love. This is a series of moments from their unique relationship.
1. This Time

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any part of the characters in it, if I did my fanfiction would be a reality.

"I could forgive you." Sakura stated plainly to the man standing a few meters behind her, watching her body intently for the sudden tenseness that indicated she would run. The twosome was a little ways away from the center of the village, on a path between a stone bench and a series of trees. It was not lost on Sakura the irony of the situation.

This was the very same path that she stood on with a raven haired boy about seven years ago. But this time she refused to be the one left behind and was finally taking fate into her own hands.

"I could've forgiven you for ignoring me when I was young. Or for taking Sasuke away and not beating some sense back into him. And…and I could forgive you for telling me on that roof top that it was going to be okay."

Kakashi flinched as she mercilessly recalled the many times he had let down his team and failed her expectations of him. But to be fair there were many many more time he had let her down, more tragic and personal ones then the one's she had just recounted.

Like the time during a mission to Sand when team Kakashi had been ambushed by a group of rogue nin. Although it was standard defence strategy to protect the medic in combat, Kakashi had gone above and beyond by throwing Sakura roughly to the ground and taking a kunai in the shoulder, which would have been level with her head had she still been there.

He had known she would've blocked the kunai and retaliated with a well thrown shuriken, which had become evident after the second bell test, but old habits die hard and he couldn't help shielding her from harm.

"But that isn't the world we live in is it? Nothing. Is. Ever. Fucking. Okay." Sakura turned her head slightly then, making the only visible part of her face one piercing green iris. It was eerily similar to the lone black eye she looked straight at. The long since faded smile of hers and that perfectly proportioned fore head that had brought misery as a child was now carefully concealed by her white and red ANBU mask.

From Sakura's profile one could tell she was far from the annoying genin she had been years ago. Her hair was no longer pink but died a lifeless black; they probably made her do it to conceal her identity. She was also taller and dressed from head to toe in black, complete with the ANBU tattoo on her left arm. Kakashi kept his eye from roving and looked back to her face and took a slight step forward, towards the young woman that was trying to run away from her home. From him.

"Sakura, this is not necessary." He spoke softly in the pre-morning night but the underlying urgency of his voice spoke volumes to the kunoichi. Sakura was angry he had sussed out the information about her departure from the Hokage and even more so that he had followed her here and was attempting to stop her.

"Stop it. Stop undermining me! Damn it Kakashi, grow up and stop acting like everything is going to work out." Sakura shouted at the masked man and spun around to face him. She regretted it immediately when she saw his eye cringe at her outburst. She sighed before raising her head to look at the lightening sky.

"This is something I need to do. You did the same thing when you joined ANBU, so please understand I need to leave for now." Sakura took several steps forward and standing up on her toes she pecked Kakashi's masked cheek. They were mere inches apart now. If he reached out he could restrain her and prevent her from leaving the village but Kakashi made sure not to take his eyes off of her and let his arms hang still at his sides.

"I could forgive you but I can't forgive myself. Goodbye Kakashi." Sakura whispered.

With a burst of flower petals she was gone.

* * *

A/N: So i'm not sure if this will be a bunch of snap-shots of the same kaka/saku relationship or just a one time confusing story.


	2. For the Sake of the Team

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, if I did there would be no need to write fanfiction!

The journey back to Konoha was one of the worst in all of Sakura's ninja mission history. Three members of team Kakashi were settling down for the night in the forest just within the borders of Fire country. Sakura, Naruto, and Kakashi had travelled all day just to reach the safe confines of familiar territory. The day before Sakura had gone to find Sasuke and tried to kill him. To say it hadn't gone as planned was an understatement, to say the least.

While Sakura attempted to trick Sasuke, he had already decided to kill her. The rest of what he made her do concerning his female teammate was just for his own sick amusement. The plan didn't work anyways and if Kakashi hadn't followed Sakura immediately after realizing she'd disappeared then he would have been seconds late to stop Sasuke's hands as they moved to murder the young kunoichi.

From her spot on her bedroll, Sakura carefully glanced over at the fearless leader of her team. He was sitting opposite of the fire from her with his book out as he scrutinized the pages. What happened hours before was still fresh in her mind and Sakura wondered if he was thinking about it as well and how close both of them came to death.

When Naruto appeared on the scene it was a relief but that was short-lived when he challenged Sasuke to a fight to the death the next time they crossed paths. If anything, it did was keep Sasuke at bay for today but next time would they be so lucky?

"Sakura, you and Naruto should sleep. I'll take first watch and wake you in two hours."

Sakura looked up at the lone black eye staring at her from across the fire. It was the first words anyone of them had spoken since they left the battlefield. Even Naruto was unusually quiet and subdued, which had surprised Sakura immensely considering he didn't question her about what had happened before he had arrived. Naruto responded to Kakashi's command with an affirmative. But Sakura wasn't ready to engage in words so she merely nodded her head and flopped down on the roll.

* * *

All Sakura could remember was a taunting voice and the bloodlust in his eyes as his hands snaked around her neck. She woke with a soundless scream and a kunai upstretched to protect her from the assailant. A hand wrapped around her forearm pushing it down toward her causing Sakura to struggle against the grip.

"Sakura calm down. It's me." The cool ripple of Kakashi's voice stilled her movements. Sakura blinked the haziness and vestiges of her nightmare away. She slowly made out his profile and the outline of the ever-present mask. It was then she saw her kunai raised hand mere inches away from the delicate skin of Kakashi's neck, his hand grasping her arm to prevent injury.

"Sorry, you surprised me. Is it my turn for watch?" Sakura asked him nonchalantly and pulled her arm away from his grasp.

"You were crying in your sleep." Kakashi simply replied. He regarded her with his usual lazy expression betraying none of the turmoil he actually felt about his ex-students trying to kill each other.

"Was I? It must have been a nightmare. Anyways, I'll take watch." Sakura got up and proceeded to the edge of the camp. Only she wasn't alone. Kakashi maintained a distance behind her until she suddenly turned around.

"What?!" Sakura yelled angrily, knowing he wanted to say something.

"I need to know why you went to him Sakura."

A part of Sakura thought Kakashi's eyes were pleading with her to give him the right answer to this question. She didn't know what the right answer was. But his cold and detached voice had her quickly dismissing the idea.

"I don't know what you mean." She shook her head as to cement her confusion. Sakura did not miss how Kakashi's hands tightened into fists at her statement.

"Don't play games with me Sakura. I've already sent Pakun ahead of us to notify the Hokage of what happened. So you can either tell me now how you came to be fighting with Sasuke or wait till we return home and deal with Tsunade." Kakashi spoke in a low voice and took his time making his point very clear. Sakura shot a look across the camp to their other teammate. Luckily, Naruto was fast asleep in his bed roll and would not accidentally hear this hushed conversation.

"Someone had to stop him. Naruto wants to save him from his demons but after all that we've seen of his since he left and all that we've heard, that Sasuke is too far gone from the person we were once teammates with. So, I went to kill him."

"Why would you make yourself out to do that? You almost died and quite frankly it was impossible for you to have defeated him."

"Don't you think I know that?! I tried to play along and be someone I haven't been in years. When that didn't work… I wanted him to do it. At least then Naruto would be released from his promise and not have to suffer any more!"

Sakura wasn't prepared when Kakashi slapped her. There wasn't enough time to recover before Kakashi painfully wrenched her chin up forcing Sakura to meet his eye.

"I taught you better than this. We never abandon our teammates." _If you do then you're worse than trash. _He didn't say it but it hung in the air between them regardless. Sakura had a great memory, she would never forget the lesson the original bell test was meant to teach. After all her team was the only one to ever pass.

Another moment later Kakashi turned away and took off into the surrounding forest, presumably to put distance between him and the thing that caused the normally cool and collected Copy nin to seethe with anger.

Sakura watched his speedy departure and palmed her sore cheek. She had prevented it until now but now her tears fell freely.

"You forget Kakashi-sensei, I've always been the one left behind." She said to no one in particular, let alone to be overheard by the two remaining members of team seven that once abandoned her just as suddenly as Sasuke had.

A/N: So I guess you could say I went with the snapshots of relationships option but then again this could be a two-shot.


	3. In a Blue Moon

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, if i did well...

It was comfortable. The feeling of waking up in the early morning on a day that required no hospital duty or missions. Waking up to a warm bed with an equally warm body lying next to you.

Sakura sleepily rolled over and felt a warm tongue rove over her face. With a frown she opened her eyes to the long snout and pointing ears of Bull, one of Kakashi's dog summons. Groaning, Sakura sat up in bed and scanned the room around her. There was no sign of the dog's master.

Out of habit Sakura reached her hand over and stroked Bull's head.

"Bull, you know you're not supposed to be in the bed. Now I suggest you bring me to that silly man or I'll reconsider my position on neutering." Sakura smiled sweetly over at her canine companion, who cringed before tumbling off the bed.

Sakura lumbered to her feet just as Bull exited the bedroom. She pulled on her favourite much worn pair of sweats and a t-shirt that was on the floor. Walking out of the room, she was assaulted by the bright sunlight that streamed through the windows in the kitchen and adjoined living room. The dust particles in the air were visible with the light beams and they danced over the wooden coffee table that was stacked with the untouched books they had brought with them.

The whining and scratches at the front door brought Sakura's attention back to the big softie of a dog pawing at the door.

"What's he doing outside this early in the morning?"

Sakura opened the door for the both of them and walked forward into the warm summer air of Fire country. Bull shot out like a bullet, most likely to get away from the doctor who threatened his fertility. Sakura followed him at a more leisurely pace fully enjoying the sights and sounds around the small cottage in the forest.

It was difficult to find long periods of time for the both of them to be together. With Sakura's hospital duty and an increase in solo missions for Kakashi, and regular missions in general, filled up most of their time. It's not like they lived together either, so all they had were the nights together. And this. This small cottage in need of some repairs in the south of Fire country, isolated from the panic that surrounded the borders every day.

No. This wasn't the place for such thoughts. This was a sanctuary hidden in the leaves. Sakura felt at peace here, where her past and his were forgotten and the only thing that mattered was filling the time with love and laughter. Which bring her to the elusive man of the hour?

Bull was still meandering ahead of her until he came to a complete stop then lifted his nose to the air for a large inhale. Sakura raised an eyebrow at his antics but she was used to the expression of a nindog catching a scent, after all she had grown up with Pakun and company. Bull gave a gruff bark and sprinted forward towards the main road. Sakura jogged to keep up.

She made it to the junction between the side path towards the cottage and the road that led to a small town a few miles away. What she saw there had her rolling in laughter.

"Bull, why are you crying? Did Sakura kick you out of the bed again? Don't worry you can go home now." With a poof the canine was gone and what remained was a hysterical kunoichi and a confused ninja holding a sack of groceries.

"What's gotten into you?"

"Seriously? That outfit Kakashi. Suspenders, really?" Sakura pointed a shaking finger at his attire. It was obvious he had gone to purchase food for them and even here it was necessary he wear a disguise after Kakashi had made such a reputation for himself in the glory days. Sakura herself was in the bingo books of other nations but unlike Kakashi who was a stickler for routine, she concealed her identity during her gruesome days and still changed it up from time to time even now.

"What's wrong with it? I thought it was the height of fashion." Kakashi pouted slightly and seeing as part of his disguise was not wearing a mask made the expression more evident.

"Um…nothing its nice, very nice." A few more giggles escaped her lips before she sobered up. Kakashi took this moment to rake a look down her figure, this did not go unnoticed and Sakura blushed lightly.

"You know those pants and that shirt, which is mine, don't exactly yell fashion forward either."

"Oh please, you wouldn't know fashion forward if it was standing in front of you in the form of a sexy kunoichi who had to wake up alone this morning." Sakura mocked glared at Kakashi until he raised his hands in surrender at the verbal challenge. Sakura looked pleased as she approached him on the road. Without hesitation she wrapped her arms around his neck and reached up to kiss him tenderly on the lips. Kakashi responded automatically, wrapping his arms around her slender waist and pulling her body flush with his. Sakura moved from his lips and trailed a path of kisses to his ear where she nibbled gently on the soft tissue and spoke in a low voice.

"So Kakashi, what did you buy for me hmm?"

"Well Sakura…" Kakashi mirrored her tone of voice to a tee and he lazily began to draw circles on her hips. He located her lips once more and leaned in for a not so tender kiss this time. Then in a sudden flourish Sakura was standing by herself on the road as Kakashi walked towards the cottage, grocery bag in hand.

"There are mangoes and persimmons in the bag." He called over his shoulder, having picked up her favourites. Sakura raced ahead and faced him squarely on.

"Oh Kakashi what would the neighbors think." Sakura gestured towards his pants and although impressive, the still ridiculously obvious tent was present. Sakura plucked an apple from the top of the grocery bag in his arms.

"We don't have neighbours for miles and hey! That's my apple Sakura."

Sakura took a bite and continued walking back home. Far be it for Kakashi not to notice the extra sway she added to her hips that enticed him to follow.

* * *

The couple sat down beside the couch, the coffee table had been pushed to the side and blankets had been set out. Sakura leaned back into the warmth Kakashi's front provided as she sat comfortably between his outstretched legs. They had finished dinner a little while ago and had decided to sit comfortably in front of the fireplace. Of course neither had thought to light the fire in the middle of a hot summer night.

It still felt perfect though. Being here cuddled close together. And to think of everything that had happened over the years. Perhaps they wouldn't have gotten this far if not for the night after Sasuke had tried to kill her or if she hadn't joined ANBU and left Konoha or even that fateful day…

"What are you thinking about?" Kakashi rubbed Sakura's shoulder softly with the pad of his thumb when he noticed she had zoned out.

"About the past I suppose. Perhaps more about the future, the Hokage's summons have been hailing us for hours now as I'm sure you've noticed."

"I'm choosing to ignore them for the time being. Besides if he really needed us he would just show up on the doorstep." Sakura snorted at that remark.

"Don't be so sure of that ever since that time he accidentally walked in on us, he's been really mindful about the closed doors thing." Kakashi laughed as the memory of it played in his head. Sakura very much enjoyed the sound of that hearty laughter as it echoed through their small home and rumbled beneath her through his chest. Moments like these always made Sakura sentimental and had her wanting to shout out in happiness.

"I love you." She settled for that instead.

Kakashi with his unmasked face and his tragic past, and that boyish smile of his replied, "I love you too."

_BANG BANG BANG_

"Aaaaand moment's over." Sakura's voice laced lightly with disappointment. She quickly stood up and Kakashi followed her lead.

"It was bound to happen, we have been ignoring him." Kakashi said as he headed into the bedroom to begin the packing process. Sakura moved to the pantry and assembled their ANBU armour and weapons on the couch.

"You jinxed it with all that talk about him coming to our door!" Sakura yelled so Kakashi would hear her from the other room. He rejoined her in the living room with a black bag of their belongings. Sakura's hand was pulled into Kakashi's as she reached for her first shin guard.

_BANG BANG BANG_

"Are you going to get that?" She mused as Kakashi held her hand in his.

"We will come back here someday." The seriousness of his tone and the intensity of his eyes bellied the light atmosphere the cottage usually carried and had Sakura wanting to believe him. But they would both be deluding themselves by making promises they might not keep.

"I know."

But hope was contagious.

* * *

A/N: So I guess you could call this a three shot? :)


	4. Not A Ghost, But A Memory

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, not even a little bit.

* * *

Sunagakure became a home away from home for Sakura. Although she is never in the same place for too long do to the overflow of missions, this is the place that she comes back to after travelling lands near and far. There are faces she recognized and that was enough to remind her of the village she left behind to become an out-of-state ANBU. Sakura had been living her life dangerously the last few years after leaving Konoha. She was beyond capable for her assassination missions and the seduction ones but that's why she took increasing risks. So, it was no surprise to the Kazekage when Sakura turned up in his office in the middle of the night, bleeding profusely from a gash spanning her back.

Gaara moved quickly but maintained his ever-present grace as he went to help Sakura into a chair.

"I'll send out for a medic." He spoke before moving to perform a communication jutsu. Sakura shot out her hand and prevented his from completing the dragon sign. With her free hand she removed her mask and tossed it to the floor.

"You don't have to. I only need to bandage the wound and then my chakra will deal with the rest." She spoke with ragged breaths attempting to calm her nerves.

"Sakura-"

"Just help me remove my armour." When Gaara didn't move, Sakura searched out his eyes. Through the look alone she pleaded with him to do this one favour. Gaara sighed in defeat. He did not acknowledge how Sakura did this every time she came back injured from a mission and how he always gave in.

Sakura slowly removed her short blade from her back, trying with ninja precision not to stretch her wound any further. Gaara took the weapon from her and placed it on his desk as she unfastened her ANBU issued armour. Gaara moved to position himself behind her and helped gingerly remove the overlay from her shoulders.

Sakura was left with a thoroughly torn sleeveless shirt on. She reached into her hip pouch, pulled out a kunai and handed it to the man behind her. Without a word Gaara slit the shirt clean off where it pooled in the chair behind Sakura leaving her top-half bare. The notion of decency had long since been discarded by Sakura what with being a medic and also recognizing that when fighting for your life covering up is the least of a ninja's worries. Gaara seemed to share the sentiment because he never became flustered around her exposed body. It was of clinical practice.

The pale skin of her back was dimly illuminated by the torch light on the walls of the office. What stood out most of course was the angry wound probably inflicted by another blade wielder but alongside it and across the expanse of skin were other long since healed scars. Some of these marks Gaara personally recognized from nights passed when he had played nurse-maid to the kunoichi. The sheer multitude of them wasn't significant considering their profession but on Sakura, whom he first met and observed as a weak and naive girl was almost sickening and certainly disheartening.

"Lean forward Sakura so I can tend to the wound." Gaara ordered when only moments before he had been reluctant to help. Sakura smiled wryly at having persuaded the Kazekage into something he so obviously did not enjoy doing. Sakura pulled out a long bandage and gauze from her medic's pouch and handed them backwards before complying with his words.

Gaara remained silent as he applied the bandage and set about unraveling the gauze around the circumference of Sakura's petite body. When the roll moved to wrap around her front, Sakura took the roll from his hands and passed it across her chest then returned it back to him to complete the cycle. The room stayed silent as she was bandaged up and unfortunately enabled Sakura to focus on the radiating pain that stemmed from her back. She made a miscalculation. The mission she had ultimately completed had been trying on her mentally. It was not like Sakura to become distracted by the mention of someone from her past. But his name falling from the mouth of the enemy made her falter for half a second. That was all it took for the sharp blade to make contact with her back. It had been truly stupid.

"Naruto has been asking about you again."

Sakura was surprised to hear Gaara speak, he was usually quiet or as she had come to realize only when Naruto wasn't involved and definitely not when Naruto is inquiring about her. Naruto had been annoying Gaara about her whereabouts after the first six months since she departed and had kept it up until Gaara had caved and now bugged her about it routinely.

"Oh? And I suppose it's the same old?" Sakura mused.

"He wants you to come back to Konoha."

"What else is new? If he really wants me to come back then he should stop assigning me missions."

"He wants to respect your space, or so he tells me. Naruto is never very good when handling women." Sakura turned to give Gaara a look that said he wasn't much better. Gaara finally pasted the last of the gauze to Sakura's shoulder and used a flurry of sand to retrieve a tunic from somewhere in the room. Sakura grabbed the article of clothing where it seemingly floated above the floor in front of her. She quickly shrugged on the tunic and not surprisingly it fitted perfectly, Gaara must have known she would need it sooner or later. He returned to his seat behind the desk and leaned back in the much worn chair.

"Sakura, it's no longer a choice." Her eyes shot upwards to his face. Gaara continued without pause.

"He wants you to go home and this time it's a direct order. Naruto has sent an ambassador here to escort you back."

Sakura could not help but snort. "So the Hokage doesn't trust me enough to return on my own and you really want me to leave?"

"You know that is not the case. Naruto is worried. And I deeply appreciate the overseeing of the expansion of our medical facilities you have done between missions. But I think you know it's time to face whatever it is you ran away from in the first place."

Sakura was stunned at Gaara's unusual display of concern and wisdom beyond his years. Perhaps becoming leader of the village had forced him to mature; she could only hope that would stay true for Naruto. As for her, the years away from home had forced her to grow. Sakura could consider herself a seasoned professional after all she had done and all she had seen while in ANBU. When she left _him_ on that road two years ago life had become more than she was willing to bear. But being solo for so long and being able to truly fight for herself, Sakura could find some semblance of resolve with the past. Except with _him_ though, that was something Sakura could not resolve or move forward with.

"When does this babysitter show up then?" Sakura crossed her hands in resignation before her.

"He's already on the way here and from the sound of how Naruto's last correspondence read it seems it was at the request of the ninja that he be sent." Gaara spoke slowly and deliberately before tossing a half opened scroll at Sakura who raised one eyebrow in response.

Sakura briefly scanned the page before rolling it up and switching it for her short sword on the desk. She bowed to the Kazekage studied her overly formal countenance and carefully watched as Sakura picked up her discarded shirt from the chair. She picked up her mask next and affixed it back upon her face before retreating to the room's only door.

"Thank you Gaara. I apologize for any inconvenience I may have caused you during these last couple of years. I'll leave Suna and meet the ambassador half way." Sakura spoke from the doorway of the office before exiting and closing the door quietly shut behind her.

Out in the hallway she crumbled. From behind the mask her real face was gave way to a grimace. Two years and she was to meet an ambassador. With her sense of calm and her new scars she has to meet an ambassador. An ambassador. _Kakashi_.

* * *

A/N: So this snapshot is more of a connecting chapter and sadly it was necessary not to include Kakashi.


	5. Sweet Temptations Part One

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, I can only bend the story to my will!

Shinobi were permitted to drink either at the age of sixteen or when promoted to the level of Jonin in the bars of Konoha. For Sakura drinking at sixteen without the presence of a shinobi war seemed inappropriate especially being a medic and seeing the harm alcohol has done to seasoned shinobi after years of abuse. But when finally promoted to Jonin two weeks shy of turning eighteen it seemed like a good time to go out and see what all Ino's fuss was about.

It was Friday night and Sakura already booked the entire weekend off from hospital shifts for the impending hangover. The greater part of the day was spent dressing up and making sure every detail of her appearance was paid attention to. Sakura was not shallow by any means but lately with all the uncertainty around Akatsuki and the great shinobi nations, it was a relief to focus attention on looking pretty for one night and forgetting everything else.

Ino arrived outside Sakura's apartment at midnight and was shocked to see that without any provocation Sakura was wearing a short but flowing deep red dress that exposed her back and tied up behind her neck.

"I just lost a bet. Here everyone was saying you were female but I simply didn't believe it with the usual god-awful medics skirt and gloves." Ino followed the comment with a flick to Sakura's forehead. Annoyed already by Ino's obsession with her forehead she pushed past the fellow kunoichi through the doorway and headed down the road towards the main street. Ino quickly caught up to her and the two fell into a measured pace side by side.

"You know I'm kidding forehead. Seriously, you look good and I'm still shocked and super happy you finally are coming out on a Friday night! It will be great I promise!" Sakura smiled slightly at her friend's exuberance as she did a complete Naruto-learned gesture and air pumped with her fist.

"Yes yes Pig, my presence is a blessing to all. Where are you taking me tonight anyways?" Sakura had reluctantly allowed Ino to plan tonight's events, which she knew from the beginning was going to somehow end badly but had forgone the usual caution in exchange for what Ino called 'an unforgettable experience.'

Ino rolled her eyes in response to Sakura's pet name. "We are going my dear sweet naïve kunoichi to the most popular bar in Konoha, and I am referring to Elements."

"A ninja hangout?" Sakura was surprised and wary about going to a ninja bar considering the high possibility of running into friends. Her promotion to Jonin at her request was a hushed issue, not because it wasn't an esteemed honour but the requirements that came with it.

The truth that Sakura was trying to hide from her allies and colleagues was she reached the level of Jonin over a year ago and then some but with the promotion came as all kunoichi know solo missions, in particular, solo missions using seduction. Sakura refused the rank a year earlier for that reason and due to her apprenticeship and work in the hospital she had escaped this certain duty. But if she wanted to oversee hospital operations or ever truly prove her worth as a shinobi, then denying the promotion any longer was impossible.

"Forehead! Forehead! Sakura, are you listening?" Ino grabbed Sakura by the arm to get her attention. Her head snapped up as she was jerked from her thoughts.

"Sorry Ino. I was just thinking about a dosage of a patient's prescription that needs to be changed." Sakura spoke the lie flawlessly. Ino put her hands on her hips and sighed in frustration.

"It's just like you to finally have a night off and be thinking about your patients. As I was saying we're here so would you please try to pay more attention to the outside world?" Ino huffed. Sakura mentally shook herself and forced all notions of upcoming seduction missions from her head.

Sakura smiled lightly. "Yeah alright. Let's go in."

* * *

Elements was the odd sort of place where both young and old would frequent in the off time between missions. But there was a definite division between the age groups. The top floor held seating and tables, this is where the seasoned ninjas spent the evening and the ground floor contained the bar and the dance floor and was mostly populated by the younger generation.

Sakura and Ino swept into the establishment mid-song and turned quite a few heads. Ino often visited the place and although she wouldn't admit it, it was Sakura that was gaining the attention. Within in moments the girls were flooded by members of the Rookie nine and other Chunin acquaintances but it was Kiba that brazenly flirted with Sakura first.

"Ah Sa-Ku-Ra, I haven't seen you in here before. Perhaps it's you first time, don't worry I'll take care of you your first time." Kiba grinned widely exposing his canine teeth and allowed Sakura to smell his heavily Sake scented breath. He attempted to sling his arm around her shoulders but Sakura easily evaded using her quick reflexes and his drunken state to move away.

"Kiba. Charming as always but should I remind you that your sister has an appointment with me next week? I might just tell her how you spend your nights at the bar, three sheets to the wind and making a fool of himself." Sakura gave him an overly cheery smile. Kiba seemed to sweat at that and quickly excused himself before wobbling back to the bar.

"Nice job handling Kiba, he's always so pushy." Ino slapped Sakura on the back in congratulations before steering her in the direction of the stairs to the second level.

"We have to secure seats first so we can leave our things there and then hang out next to the bar and on the dance floor!" Ino squealed before taking off up the stairs to beat some imaginary person she seemed to be racing for a good spot.

Sakura ascended the stairs slower hoping to put room between her crazy friend. When she reached the top the entire atmosphere of the place seemed to change. There was a cozy almost musky atmosphere that surrounded the groups of ninjas, some friends and others lovers. She recognized some of them as her Jonin superiors dotting the secluded tables.

"Hey Forehead!" Ino shouted.

Before Sakura could take a more detailed look around she spotted the blonde at one of the darker corners of the upper floor and made her way to the table she had claimed.

"Alright but your bag here while I go get us drinks. And you don't have to order, I'll get you something delicious!" Before Sakura even formed a rebuttal, Ino bounded away to the lower level and left the rosette on her own. She sighed before plopping down in the booth Ino designated as their seats for the night. Strange how once again the feeling of joining Ino on a Friday seemed to be a bad idea.

At around one in the morning Sakura thought there was no end to the steady stream of ninja coming and going from the club keeping it well above allowed occupancy.

At around one o' one in the morning Sakura could not get away from the creepy guys incessantly approaching her every single minute out on the dance floor.

At one twenty-five in the morning Sakura swore Ino was trying to send her into a coma with a never ending supply of the sickly sweet fruit drinks she loved. Sakura would much prefer something stronger and that tasted as bad as the hangover it would cause.

At one thirty in the morning Sakura finally had enough of the dance floor, the thrum of sweating bodies including her own dancing to music that carried an underlying primal beat.

At one forty-eight in the morning Sakura finally convinced Ino to let her go sit down on the upper level, leaving Ino perfectly content with her arms wrapped around a certain ninja with an addiction to chewing senbon.

It was exactly at two o' eight in the morning when, Sakura laid her head on the table and once more thought about her promotion and why she ultimately came out tonight, when the situation changed.

"Good morning Sakura." A low tenor voice with a slow drawl broke through the haze of alcohol. Dread of having a human blood-hound on her scent had Sakura calculating all the ways of escape from her current position in the booth.

But the night had worn her out and escape seemed futile when inebriated to the extent that her cheeks had a heartbeat. So she did the next best thing. Sakura raised her head with as much grace she could muster and blearily regarded the man who slid into the seat across from her.

"Yoooo." She exhaled before laughing so hard she began to cry.

When the laughter died out however the tears still came.

* * *

A/N: So this will be a two part snapshot, thought i'm not entirely sure when the second part will be up.


	6. Versus Part Two

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto but I do own a pen and paper

Kakashi stiffened when Sakura began to cry. His mind immediately went to the last time he saw this heart-wrenching display; Sakura, at 16 cried because she had been abandoned by team seven long ago. He regretted the night after she confronted Sasuke immensely but could not find an appropriate way to apologize. Instead, Kakashi gave her space and had since remained inside the role of sensei and nothing more.

But now two years later and he was provided a renewed opportunity to help her, act as a mentor and confidante. Sakura hastily wiped away her tears as quick as they fell and felt shamed for having caused a scene in public and in front of her indolent former sensei.

"Sorry, I've been drinking and have no idea why I'm acting like this." She hurriedly explained. Kakashi wasn't fooled. Although he clearly identified the presence of alcohol in her system, Sakura never cried anymore and he doubted she came out to drink this heavily on a whim. There must be a reason for her current state.

"You don't seem like the drinking type." He provided, goading her into revealing more by providing a simple observation.

'Shinobi rule #478: It is imperative to say less so the target will say more,' Sakura had no idea why that rule flitted into her mind; surely Kakashi would not be using interrogation techniques to dig into her mind. No, it was simply Kakashi making small talk with underdeveloped social skills.

"I'm not…Though with a shishou like Tsunade it would not be surprising." Sakura mumbled out the last bit before once again placing her head on the table in an effort to stop the dizziness. She focused on breathing deeply to calm her nerves and tried to remember something on the fringes of her mind. A fact long since stored away in her memory banks.

"Perhaps you're celebrating? I heard about your immediate promotion to the Jonin ranks."

If Sakura wasn't already drunk she would've sworn the floor just fell out from under her. It was her time to stiffen slightly but she kept her head down for fear of what her face would betray. Kakashi did not miss her tense at the mention of the promotion that he curiously overheard from Shizune. Now he knew what this concerned and would better be able to provide advice. Sakura kept her head bowed and refused to meet his eye; she was sure that if he looked at her with that piercing, seemingly all-knowing stare then the dam barely holding her conflicting feelings together would burst.

"But generally celebrating is more upbeat. Becoming a Jonin is a serious milestone, one I'm sure you're nervous about but you are a very capable kunoichi Sakura and there is no reason to be unsure of your position in this elite-" Kakashi continued unbeknownst of how Sakura ears perked up at the mention of being nervous. But he came to an immediate halt when the petite woman began to laugh.

Sakura's frame rose with every breath as she tried not to scream in frustration or cry in despair. But it seemed alcohol played a role in suppressing her normal kindness and revealing the ugly head of inner Sakura as her true feelings were voiced.

"Leave it to you to assume I'm nervous about joining an elite group. To presume I feel some kind of inadequacy about myself that I can't handle being a Jonin." Even liquored up she spoke low and deadly. Kakashi was transfixed by the emergence of coldness as she looked at him, the anger in her own eyes making him uncomfortable.

"I'm tired of this. I'm tired of you. I have been more your equal than you seem to realize but perhaps some misguided notion of being my sensei remains. But let me set you straight. I chose to become a better shinobi by asking to be Tsunade's apprentice and if you knew anything about me at all, it would be that I am a former member of team seven but I was never a student of Hatake Kakashi."

With that Sakura slid away from the table and with measured strides that bellied her intoxicated state headed for the exit without a single glance back.

* * *

The air outside refreshed her body when Sakura left Elements and was welcomed by the cool night. Kakashi's presence was suffocating and although she regretted losing self-control, Sakura felt a strange relief. It was akin to a well-kept secret finally coming to light to all those involved, no longer would she bear the burden.

Despite her drinking she wasn't at all drunk. Sakura was well gone when Kakashi originally sat down but as with most ninja you did not allow yourself to enter a state that would leave you defenseless. Being a medic also caused her chakra to force out toxins with or without conscious thought so by the end of that conversation Sakura had full control of her mental faculties.

What's done was done. Sakura could not change anything about this night, instead she wanted to run home and sleep and put it behind her.

* * *

Kakashi always had a quick reply or sarcastic quip even in the most inappropriate of situations but he was speechless when it came to Sakura's outburst. Several minutes after she left, he was still shocked by how she talked to him. Without respect or any sense of propriety she fractured another part of his heart.

Not once since he took that misfit team of genin under his wing did he think he had failed Sakura. Instead Kakashi always believed she failed herself, failed because she hadn't been a serious shinobi from the start and chased after pre-teen fantasies. Even now he most deeply regretted how he failed Sasuke from not leading him away from a dark future, not ever did it occur to him that Sakura felt abandoned and left to fend for herself. When Tsunade placed her under her care, he thought she would set the confused girl straight and certainly not that Sakura sought her out as a last ditch effort to save herself.

Kakashi wanted to hang his head in shame and apology. But it would not be enough. Obito had taught him to never leave a teammate behind but what he had not considered was abandonment meant more than dying.

"Eh, Kakashi-sempai what are you doing here? And where's fore…Sakura?" Ino waved a tentative hand at the man to gain his attention. When she walked up to the table he had been staring hard at the seat across from him. Flippantly Kakashi mumbled she left.

"Oh good because I'm about to take off myself. Just came back to grab my purse." Ino nervously tittered before reaching over the empty seat to grab her belongings. However, next to her purse was the bag Sakura arrived with earlier that night.

"Damn, I can't believe she would forget this. Her keys are in here." Ino knew she wouldn't technically need them being a ninja and all but it was a hassle nonetheless.

Kakashi eyed the small over the shoulder bag before standing up and holding out his hand to the blonde kunoichi. "I can take that to her." He politely offered.

Ino was wary of handing over Sakura's things to the Copy nin even if he had once been Sakura's sensei. The way he offered sounded more like a demand than a kind suggestion… but Ino was feeling tired as the excitement of the night was beginning to wear off and she didn't want run over to Sakura's home which was nowhere near her own. She handed him the pouch before fixing a loose strand of hair.

"Thank-you Kakashi-sempai, I…. and he's already gone. I reaally hate ninjas." Ino grumbled before stomping off.

* * *

A/N: Funny thing happened decided to make this a three part snap shot instead of two because I wrote too much. But I wonder if I should update the last part immediately or wait a bit... Any suggestions? Also the title of the next two parts may not be the same but it will say part 2 and part 3.


	7. Bitter Realizations Part Three

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, but I am in the process of making a reality ray that will bring the characters to life!

Sakura was down the street of her apartment when she felt the whisper of his chakra. That was the only warning she had before Kakashi appeared a few meters in front of her. She was shocked he followed her home from the bar when assuming he would remain a safe distance away from her like he always has. But then she caught sight of the small bag in his hand and understood the situation. Without out word she stepped forward and held out her hand expectantly.

Kakashi deposited the bag into her awaiting palm. She had yet to look him in the face, out of anger or embarrassment he could not determine. Sakura didn't waste a second and began to pass him and carry on home.

"Sakura-" Kakashi started. She paused.

"Seduction missions." Her voice rang clear in the silent night.

Neither breathed for a moment and each stood looking towards opposing directions. From the outside the pair would like slightly comical, side by side but facing different ways as they carried on a conversation.

"The rank of Jonin means solo missions and for kunoichi that means the beginning of their seduction assignments. That's what I'm worried about." Sakura breathily said aloud.

Kakashi wanted to choke on the bile rising in his throat. It went without saying that kunoichi bared a responsibility like no other and gave more of their bodies than a man ever could to the job. But it was a strategic solution that before today he never fully grasped the implications of because no one he was close to spoke about it, or was experienced to the point that it was not an issue.

But with Sakura, someone he watched mature and grow being used for the dreadful deed was outrageous. Kakashi knew though, that no matter what was said or done this was part of being a Leaf shinobi and Tsunade herself could not change the course of. So what could he say to ease the feeling of selling yourself off? Nothing.

Sakura interpreted Kakashi's silence as a loss for words. It didn't surprise her, what exactly do you say to the soldier that was ordered to distract the enemy…by any means possible. She supposed it was for the best, better he said nothing than said something out of pity. Sakura began to walk away.

"I'm Hatake Kakashi. I may have never been your teacher but at the very least I am an ally." Kakashi intoned softly. Sakura eyes widened with shock and apprehension. She froze, unsure where he was going with this.

"I look forward to working with you in the future. As equals." Kakashi held out his hand to her.

Sakura was mesmerised by his display of camaraderie, she could never imagine having Kakashi the infamous Copy nin declaring them brothers in arms, at least more so than the shared leaf insignia on their headbands. She assumed that so few were offered this position.

The earlier moment in the bar came to mind suddenly. The important fact she couldn't remember finally formed in her mind. She had recently read a psych evaluation in Kakashi's medical file, one written years prior, a single line of it read:

- _will put his allies above all else when in the field but has an unnatural lack of trust towards anyone other than a proven friend – _

Sakura wanted the acknowledgment that came with being trusted at a friend's back, to protect their blind spots. Anything else would not make them equal.

Sakura grasped his outstretched hand in her own.

"I can't accept that, I want friendship. Anything else isn't enough." Kakashi gave her his usual eye crinkle smile, recognizing that she knew he held friends at a higher standard than allies. Sakura grinned for real the first time that night. The two shook firmly on their deal.

* * *

_Three Weeks Later_

Sakura was closing in on Konoha's main gate after more than a week long mission had taken her away. Once she walked through the outer perimeter walls then she safely could say that her first seduction mission was over. And with the first done it would make any subsequent missions easier to deal with. At least she hoped that's how it would work.

After her target was effectively silenced, what remained was a gut-wrenching feeling of being sore and dirty. It made her feel weak. The whole purpose of these missions was to act weak and strike when the target was distracted with your body. But for all kunoichi it was difficult to act submissive when their entire lives had been devoted to proving their strength. The moment she drew the concealed kunai however, made her feel more in control and more powerful than any singular moment before. But those overpowering feelings scared her.

Since the night at the bar, Sakura had not seen Kakashi but with hospital duty the following week and being deployed for her mission immediately after allow a meeting. All of it left her questioning the validity of the entire proposal they agreed upon. Maybe he would blame it on the alcohol or the course of the night and revoke the entire thing. It was impossible for her to imagine being abandoned by him again, especially after giving him another chance.

AAh but there was no point dwelling, it would only distract her mind and though the distraction was welcome during the dark moments of her mission, it would not do so well back in the hospital.

Sakura was close enough now to home that she could see the two Chunin guards on duty at the check-in point. She moved to approach them but was struck by the image of a silver- haired ninja leaning against the side of the open gate.

Without a moment's hesitation, Sakura took off into a dead run and didn't stop until she had thrown herself at Kakashi. He received her with open arms as she clung to his flak jacket and started to sob uncontrollably. Sakura's only coherent thought was to hold on to this anchor of safety that would not make her suffer as completely as her target had. Just hold on.

Kakashi held her tight. Silently he promised that he would not let her go until she was okay. Whatever the hell okay could possibly be now.

A/N: Aaaaaand the three part snap shot is over and in case you didn't but the chapter titles together (because who does that?) it reads Sweet Temptations versus Bitter Reealizations.


	8. One Last Waltz Through Time

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I somehow did it would be awesome!

"Get down!"

That was the only warning Sakura got before a fire storm ripped through the medic's tent and she was thrown meters back into the open road of a deserted Konoha district.

The world around was hazing and she could barely recognize the environment around her. Then the shock began to wear off and in its place was a searing pain down her arm right arm. From the ground Sakura couldn't see the wound, only feel the dizzying pain of a third degree burn.

Slowly with practiced caution she rose to her feet, mentally tallying other wounds on her body. There was a lateral flesh wound across her left leg caused by some shrapnel that needed to be removed and closed soon. But first Sakura surveyed the area for any immediate threat.

The ground around her had been raised and where there were once buildings there was now only rubble. Sakura could not see anyone standing, enemy or otherwise. Shizune had been in the tent with her. This thought sent Sakura stumbling around the ruins hoping beyond hope to find some sign of the poison expert.

"Shizune! Shizune! Goddamit someone answer me!"

_PING PING_

Sakura's ears perked up of the light sound of metal against metal. She strained her ears to locate a position but it was too faint for her ears.

"Please wait! I'm summoning help!" Sakura yelled into the open air. Quickly she performed the signs for her summoning technique. A poof of smoke appeared and in it was one of Kakashi's dogs, Akino. He looked her over quickly before coming forward and nuzzling her leg with his head.

"I'm sorry Akino, I know you must have been on patrol with Kakashi but I need you to help me find some people who've been buried under the rubble." She knelt down to speak to him on an equal level.

"I'll do what I can. But are you going to be okay?" The ninken spoke heavily with worry and indicated her arm with his nose. Sakura petted him in response and smiled.

"Of course. Now I need you to find the source of that sound." Sakura waited a moment and sure enough there was a _ping ping_. Akino wasted no time and took off in a north eastern direction. Sakura struggled slightly to match the pup's pace but kept moving forward as the noise grew louder.

Akino stopped just short of a large wooden column covered by several sections of wall. He barked loudly just as another _ping ping_ came from below all of it. Sakura went to work immediately; she focused chakra into her hands and began the process of lifting the wall off of the beam. When it was thrown away and the dust cleared Sakura made out her friend.

"Shizune! Are you all right?" Sakura knelt by the human shaped hole in the ground where Shizune held a senbon and a kunai in each hand.

"A laceration across my chest, some difficulty breathing but once that wooden beam is gone then I'm assuming I'll be able to breath." Shizune said slightly breathless. Sakura nodded her understanding and went to one end of the column.

"Hold tight. Akino, I lift and you pull. Okay?"

Akino barked and moved behind Shizune biting the collar of her white coat. Sakura lifted the entire thing with her legs while Akino pulled Shizune quickly out of the way before Sakura set the beam back down. She rejoined the pair as Shizune gingerly stood up, testing her limbs for damage. There were no visible wounds on her friend but that didn't eliminate the presence of internal bleeding. Shizune surveyed the damage around them quietly, a slow burning fire was still going at the centre of where their tent had stood minutes before. She seemed to be in a little shock herself, Sakura used her distraction to probe her chest with chakra.

Sure enough there was internal bleeding. Sakura began healing her insides but considering her standing up it wouldn't be the best job.

"What do you think happened?"

Sakura knew what she meant. There was no way possible that the enemy had broken through the gate of the village yet and the fact that Akino was on patrol was more proof of that theory. It's possible they were bombed from above but that also didn't make sense with Sai patrolling the skies. Sakura shook her head on frustration, nothing made sense about this isolated attack.

"I'm not sure what happened but it doesn't matter. We need to look for other survivors of the fire and wait for a message from the Hokage."

"You're right. With Akino here we should be able to find any survivors quickly. First though you should take care of those injuries."

"I'll take care of my leg for now. I can't waste any chakra on the burn though, just in case." Sakura gave Shizune a little smile. She knelt down and tended to the gash that it turns out a shard of glass is deep within. Sakura steadied her breathing then inhaled one final time and ripped the glass out with her exhale. She grunted slightly as blood pooled on the ground behind her. With a small surge of chakra Sakura sealed the wound until it stopped bleeding and all that remained was the angry line of forcefully sealed tissue. Now it was important not to move the area too much or it would reopen. Sakura wrapped it up with bandage from her thigh to better hold things together.

"Alright there. It's a field job but it will have to do until we regroup with-."

"Sakura down!"

Shizune shoved Sakura hard to the ground as another wave of fire rose over them. But it wasn't like a regular fire; its shape and direction were to controlled, blown from a source instead of wild. Sakura knew instantly what was coming next. She used her leg and with a chakra enhanced foot kicked Shizune far from herself as a short bladed shuriken emerged from the fire's roaring depths. It sliced through the air where Shizune had been crouching seconds before and made a full circle, returning to the wielder.

Sakura moved immediately as the fire began to recede and rushed over to where she had kicked Shizune, Akino followed dutifully at her ankles. Shizune was sprawled out against some debris and there was blood seeping into her hair. Sakura checked her pulse and was relieved she was only unconscious and that her kick hadn't accidentally killed an ally.

"Akino, I need you to go get help. Find one of the generals, tell them that I've located one of our targets and will hold them off until they get here." Akino took off towards the village gate. Hopefully all the smoke and fire will attract someone faster than Akino can run. Sakura pulled off and balled up what was left of her medic's coat and placed it under Shizune's head. She marched far from her, back to where she was during the last attack.

"Hello Sakura."

_Shinobi Rule #237: At all costs the medic must not be a hindrance to their team. In the event that the rest of the team has perished, then it is up to the medic to complete the mission at all costs. _

Sakura faced her attacker squarely on. She would take up this mission and fight her hardest to see it through to the end no matter what.

"Sasuke."

* * *

When Kakashi saw the explosion in the Uchiha district his first instinct was to go and find Sakura. Konoha's only medical tent had been moved from the forest to the empty open area after the frontline had been pushed back repeatedly, it was no longer safe for them outside the village. But Kakashi had to stick to his patrol unless otherwise directed by the Hokage. Currently all of the war room generals had important positions on the battlefield that were integral to winning this war.

But something had to have gone wrong to cause such a large explosion especially because the enemy had yet to breach Konoha.

"Kakashi." He looked back at Akino who usually remained silent when he was travelling with the pack.

"Sakura's summoning me."

"Go." If he wasn't worried before then he definitely was now. But as long as she could summon dogs he could maintain his composure and focus on the task at hand. Nonetheless, Kakashi pushed himself faster, after reinforcing the seals on this ninjutsu he would go to her.

* * *

"No 'kun' this time Sakura? Have you finally gotten over me?" He chuckled darkly at her expense.

Sakura's first thought was to avert her eyes from his. She instead took in the symbolic black and red cape that billowed around his form and the sheathed sword in his hand. It wasn't easy to look straight at his face with the danger of those blood red eyes capturing her own. But she saw enough to piece together a young looking man with very short hair and a befitting aristocratic bone structure.

"Things change all the time and despite those eyes you've been gifted with, you are blind." Sakura replied thoughtfully. The only indication that what she said angered him was the slight tightening of his fist. It amazed Sakura that such a powerful and experienced shinobi as himself would let his emotions show so transparently.

"Be quiet. You're nothing but an insignificant little girl who is standing in her grave." He roared from across the road. Sakura had to keep riling him up, keep him talking and hopefully buy more time for herself.

"I found it. The mission report from fourteen years ago. Uchiha Itachi was ordered to massacre his entire clan to prevent a coup against the Konoha government. The entire record was sealed away and hidden from sight. At least until Naruto became Hokage and purposely sought it out. He knew everything then and I knew and then everyone knew. When Itachi was confirmed dead, Naruto ordered for his name to be added to the cenotaph and then awarded him a medal of valour." Sakura continued to bide her time by rambling on.

"That's enough!" Sasuke yelled as he charged toward her, sword drawn.

Sakura searched the ground for the nearest weapon but there was nothing in sight that would match the power of his sword. She did the next best thing. Punching the ground hard forced the earth to fracture and explode upward.

"That trick won't work on me!" Sasuke jumped into the air to avoid the pit Sakura made and descended rapidly with a downward arc of his sword. He expected to feel sword against flesh but instead he hit a thick wall. Separating Sasuke from her, Sakura erected a wall of sand and cement particles. The wall immediately began to crumble and out came Sakura's fist; laden with chakra it struck his sword dead on. The force of the punch pushed him a few feet away from her and Sakura flipped several times to put more distance between them.

Sasuke tried to remain neutral but truthfully he was shocked at seeing a variation of Gaara's sand shield technique being used by her. How did she know how to do a technique that was essentially a bloodline limit? He glared over at the small pinked-haired nuisance that kept her eyes firmly planted at his collarbone.

"Naruto couldn't understand how your brother the martyr sacrificed himself to stop Madara and you end up disgracing him anyways. He literally gave his life for everyone in Konoha but especially for you. Then you turn around and unleash havoc on the very place he was trying to save. Isn't that funny?" Sakura gave a small laugh that was far too stressed to be real.

"How did you learn that jutsu Sakura?" He asked slowly, like he was addressing a child that was too stupid to understand it any other way. Sakura ignored his question and countered with one of her own.

"What's your plan here Sasuke? You went after the medics first; there was no point to that." It was hard for Sakura to keep her eyes on the ground, it would be much easier to read him if she could see his whole face. He chuckled once more and Sakura realized she was losing control over the conversation and therefore over the entire situation.

"I came for you. Isn't that what you've always wanted? You don't need to kick up a fuss." Sasuke smiled up at her. Sakura focused on the smile, it was unnerving and unnatural to her. It also meant he was calm now; teasing was never a good sign when dealing with the enemy. It meant he knew he had the upper hand.

"Naruto won't come. He may have said he wanted to fight you one last time but that was years ago. His responsibilities as the Hokage come before everything else now."

"We'll see about that. When I use you to lure him away from the war, for your sake he'd better come." It was Sasuke's first mistake. Now Sakura knew his true intentions without having to resort to advanced interrogation techniques.

"You'd have to capture me first Sasuke." Sakura smiled at her ex-teammate.

* * *

Sakura was able to land one last punch on Sasuke's sword making it break apart into several shards. It didn't slow his movements though and he retaliated with a kick to her side. Unable to do much besides absorb the blow, she slid across the ground, scraping her skin on pavement along the way.

Wasting no time Sakura was back on her feet and ready to counter Sasuke's kunai with her own. They clashed back and forth, equally matched in this area of combat. But Sakura had to keep her eyes on his feet and prevent them from straying too far upwards. Thankfully, Kakashi had trained with her since the age of eighteen to prepare for a battle against a sharingan.

His feet were also a dead giveaway for his next move. The tenseness that thrummed through the muscle just before he turned or crouched were followed all by Sakura's trained eye. The hard part was anticipating where his arms would strike. Usually Sakura could predict her enemy's arm movements but with Sasuke who varied technique so often made the task difficult and allowed him to earn a few cuts on her.

Sakura reeled backwards as one of those cuts landed on her forearm. Ignoring the sting, she threw her kunai at Sasuke then flew toward him with a chakra scalpel. He parried her hand but made the mistake of making skin contact allowing Sakura to sever a charka channel in his arm.

Sasuke immediately moved away from her to access the damage to his arm. Sakura withdrew just as quickly, her chakra was starting to give from so much use. She watched as Sasuke attempted to move the lower half of his arm but nothing happened. He wouldn't be able to use it again unless there existed a person more skilled than herself in chakra line construction.

"The only person who can reverse the damage done to your arm is me. I wouldn't have thought it before but you can't defeat me Sasuke."

He didn't seem fazed at all by her.

"You're wrong. I've already beat you." Sasuke held up his uninjured hand and snapped two fingers. In the peripheral of Sakura's vision she saw the shadow of a person jump through some of the wreckage over to an unconscious Shizune. Sakura could clearly see a kunai being raised and held against her neck.

She zeroed in on the person holding her friend hostage. It was a skeleton of a woman, her cheeks were sunken and her entire face sallow looking. Sakura remembered her as the woman traveling with Sasuke when he was sixteen, Karin.

The sickly woman was holding the blade still but her entire body shook with small trembles and she mumbled the same sentence over and over: "I did it Sasuke! Are you proud of me? Are you proud of me? I got the bitch." Sakura knew the woman had lost or was losing her mind. Karin had never left Sasuke's side this entire time and staying with someone so completely self-absorbed, driven by hate had led to her current condition. It is impossible to love a monster sane.

Sakura tore her eyes away from her and refocused on Sasuke. It didn't take long for her to realize that if she left with him when she was twelve then she would be exactly as Karin is now… if not already dead.

Sasuke was boiling over with arrogance at having cornered Sakura into surrender. She had no choice but to unclip the weapons pouch around her waist and throw it to the ground. He had won. Sasuke closed the distance between them in several strides and stood right in front of her. His hand came up to caress her cheek in a disturbingly loving way. Sakura felt sick and turned her head to look away.

She prayed silently for help to arrive soon. She needed someone to strengthen her when this man made her feel weak. Sakura desperately wanted Kakashi, because for once she wasn't sure she would make it home to him on her own. She didn't want to be Karin, couldn't let herself become a pawn to this revenge crazed man.

"Look at me Sa-ku-ra." Sasuke cooed to her before forcing her face towards his. It took a second for her to meet his blood red eyes and then she lost all control, her mind spinning away with those three tomoes.

A/N: This one was pretty difficult to write. At first I was thinking that it was too long and I should make into several parts but then I felt that my snapshots shouldn't always be at the 1000 word mark, so you get this slightly longer one instead. Hope you enjoyed :)


	9. Home

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, although I wouldn't mind pretending just for one day.

"Go home Sakura! You are no use to anyone if your chakra is exhausted." Shizune barked from her bent position over a patient, trying to close a chest wound.

"But Shizune-"

"If you do not leave right now to go rest, so help me I will have you tranquilized!" Sakura could see the beads of exhaustion running down Shizune's face, mixing with the blood crusted there. It was a sad sight and made Sakura think twice before protesting more, plus she figured after a few hours of sleep she could convince Shizune to do the same.

Sakura discarded her bloody gloves and apron in a seriously overflowing and therefore hazardous medical waste bin. It wasn't surprising to find the field hospital in such disarray, since its quick erection there wasn't much time for anything besides healing the scarily increasing number of patients. But forgoing any thought to possibly clean up, she fled from the hospital.

It took her only minutes to return to the barracks supplied by Yamato. Being the head medic for Konoha had earned Sakura a private room but with the limited space and the fact that Kakashi also had a private room, she opted to bunk with him and give up the room to someone else. Besides, it wasn't like they were ever in the room together, Kakashi only came back at odd times to rest and restock before rejoining the war room or leading stealth teams into enemy territory. Therein laid a deep want to see him, just for a moment when it wasn't a side-long across injured bodies when he brought in the wounded.

Shaking off these thoughts Sakura entered her room, exhaustion began to fog her mind, the only thought about sleep. Without removing any of her guards or clothes she flopped down on the bed and quickly closed her eyes. Her body screamed for rest but her mind was anxious and hyperactive. War had broken out only a month prior and since then all semblance of normal life had been replaced with fighting tooth and nail with the enemy. _Creak._

Sakura froze at the sound of the door opening, her body thrumming with adrenaline.

Carefully controlling her breathing, she waited for movement across the room. The unknown person silently glided across the floor without a single sound, her only clue was the sudden pressure indicating he was leaning over the bed now. Sakura slid a kunai from her boot with minimal movement just as the figure tumbled onto the bed. In a split-second she flipped herself onto the person and readied her kunai.

"As much as I enjoy you playing rough, this is going a little too far." Kakashi said lazily. Sakura smiled warmly for what was probably for the first time in several weeks.

"I'd apologize but then again who sneaks up on a girl while she's sleeping." The only lamp on in the room just barely illuminated Sakura when she cocked her head to the side in mock anger. Truthfully, with him she couldn't muster an ounce of anger; instead she peaked at his cloth covered face happily before discarding her kunai in the wall near the door with a flick of her wrist.

"We both know you weren't sleeping. Besides, Naruto kept nagging me to go home…so I'm home." His eye crinkled and she knew he was smiling. Sakura sighed in exacerbation and slowly shifted herself to lie next to him with her back to his side.

"It seems our friends want us far away from the field for a few hours." Sakura yawned out before once again closing her eyes. "But this is the first time in a long time we've actually been within arm's length. Too bad I'm so tired." She mumbled, already giving in to her tiredness.

"Oi Sakura! Don't fall asleep with your armour on." Kakashi shook her lightly but her own hand came up and swatted his away.

"You're still wearing a flak jacket and I'm too tired to move, so if it bothers you that much do it yourself."

Sakura felt the bed shift as Kakashi stood up and heard him fumble with his clothes. She then heard the distinctive thunk of shoes being removed followed by a lighter sound of clothes being draped over the only chair in the room. The bed dipped when he rejoined her, this time he went under the bed covers instead of lying on top like her.

Sudden warmth pooled at her stomach where Kakashi's hand moved under her top and caressed her smooth skin with his calloused palm. From below she felt the tug of her shin guards and sat up in surprise to see another Kakashi at the foot of the bed. She groaned.

"Kakashi! You know you shouldn't waste chakra on a clone for things like this." Sakura glanced over to her bed partner but his eyes were closed. The clone finished removing the guards and set them next to the bed. Sakura looked at this Kakashi instead and beckoned him over with her hand. Ultimately, she resigned in defeat and decided to take advantage of the situation being as sleepy as she was. Sakura grinned because Kakashi made the clone just before he came back to bed, his clone only clothed in boxers.

"Help me with these?" Sakura gestured shyly to her over shirt and pants. She was always slightly timid around his clones, though they were exact copies it was strange to be completely herself around them. The clone gently tugged the shirt over her head, leaving Sakura in a black tank top. Then he moved to her pants, unbuckling them first before sliding them slowly down her legs, making sure to trail his fingers on the skin of her thighs as he went. She shivered at the feeling. With a final kick on her part the pants came off and fell to the floor.

"Thank yo-"

Sakura stopped mid-sentence when she was lifted off the bed by Kakashi's clone, one hand under her legs and the other supporting her back. She watched stunned as the clone pulled back the blanket and tucked her underneath the blankets. He placed a kiss to her forehead before turning to dispel but Sakura pulled him back roughly. The force of the pull brought his face mere centimeters from hers. Without hesitation she brought her lips to his in a loving kiss that was far too short when she felt the tell-tale poof.

Sakura settled back down in bed and returned to lying on her side. Two strong and warm arms moved to wrap around her waist and pull her backwards into Kakashi's broad chest.

"Not so tired now are you?" She said knowingly. He would have received the memories and sensations of his clone the moment it disbursed.

"I can't sleep while you are kissing other men."

"Don't tell me you're jealous of your clone?" Sakura deadpanned. Kakashi reflexively held Sakura tighter to him but she managed to wiggle herself around so she faced him. This close and perfectly still she could tell he was at about his limit, both physically and mentally. His sharingan eye was squeezed shut from overuse and his other eye was staring sleepily at her with the smallest amount of tenseness lining the brow.

This was wartime and this wasn't their home. There was no promise of tomorrows or even tonights. All she and Kakashi had was right here in this room for a single moment before time got the better of them.

But despite all that, lying here so close that she could feel his body heat warming her, made it feel like home. She ran a hand through his silver hair and watched as he closed his other eye, relaxing at her touch. Sakura smoothed his creased brow with her small hand before running cooling chakra into the inflamed nerves of his left eye.

His hand shot out to stop her own from delivering more chakra. "Don't. I'm fine." He said tersely. Sakura put on her no nonsense face.

"At the very least I can reduce the pain so you can sleep better tonight and don't forget you started the whole using chakra unnecessarily. So lie there and be quiet." She ordered.

Kakashi removed his hand and instead placed it on her side as she finished the healing process. He was wise enough to know now not to go against a powerful kunoichi's orders or in most cases against any of Sakura's orders. If one was foolish enough to do that, well then your name is probably Naruto. It was also a great relief to not feel the strain on his sight for the first time in weeks.

"There. All done." Sakura smiled slightly before placing a light kiss on his eyelid. Kakashi squeezed her arm in thanks before she nuzzled closer to him, so close that her nose touched his cheek and his the same. Kakashi tilted his head slightly and their lips met in an effortless kiss, effortless because any more energy would be impossible for the pair but also effortless because this was second nature to them.

"Better than my clone?" He asked humorously after pulling back to look at Sakura. She rolled her eyes before turning her body away.

"Yeah yeah, best I've ever had." Kakashi smirked from behind her. Sakura grabbed his arm and draped it around her body and laced their fingers tightly together. He always fit perfectly with her.

It had taken almost half an hour but finally the couple fell asleep.

A/N: So my recent chapters have mostly been older Sakura but hopefully I will change up the time period again. And in case you haven't realized the chapters jump around to different times.


	10. As You Are

Disclaimer: I don't own Naurto but if for some reason there's a zombie apocalypse then for sure I would buy the rights to it.

The forest was passing by in a blur as Sakura propelled herself quicker and harder with every tree branch. She had traveled almost a day and a half and it was only that very morning she left the desert and entered Fire country forest.

Sakura was beyond fearful for her reunion with Kakashi and perhaps that's why she was pushing herself harder to cover more distance. At least then there would be an excuse for the loud thumping of her heart.

It's been two years since Sakura joined ANBU and left Konoha, ceasing all communication with the village. At the time it was necessary for her, she couldn't move on in life with the constant reminders of failure from the past. That kind of thing was impossible even for her to do without sizable proximity. For the most part she had been able to accept and let go of that past. But there was still one thing that had not been taken care of in the years away…

Sakura came to a small clearing in the forest and jumped down from her position to the ground. Only five kilometers from her position and she felt the tingling of oncoming chakra that was as familiar to her as her own.

Sakura fidgeted with her newly returned pink hair as she waited for her envoy to arrive. Dying it back the night before went against all her honed stealth skills but it seemed appropriate now that she was returning to Konoha. The way she had chosen to live up until now had to be shuffled away into memory, Sakura wasn't sure if she would stay in ANBU full time now or resume her post at the hospital. From the way Naruto had mentioned to Gaara, the hospital was in desperate need of a medical chief and the position had all but been wrapped up and preserved for her.

Sakura flipped her kunai pouch open and closed as these thoughts circled in her head. She realized that perhaps this wasn't nearly as important as the situation at hand.

The sun was just beginning to dip when an ANBU clad shinobi entered the edges of Sakura's meeting spot. The hair was a dead giveaway to the ninja's identity. Long, silver and standing up. Kakashi had his mask on as well, not that it mattered much considering underneath it only revealed one quarter of his face.

Standing up from leaning against a tree she went towards him in the middle of the clearing. Kakashi paused and waited for her to approach. He knew not to overstep her personal space; if she wanted to come it was up to her to close the distance between them. Sakura quickly closed that distance much to his surprise only to bring her hand back to slap the mask straight off his face.

He kept his composure despite the physical hit. His cheek stung but it wasn't nearly as painful as the glare Sakura was giving him right now. Her emerald eyes through the white and red mask conveyed a world of hurt and pent up anger.

"Take off the mask." Referring now to the cloth one that was always covering his face.

He watched her carefully and slowly inched his fingers around the delicate material. With one tug it pooled around his neck exposing his self to her scrutiny. This was the first time he removed it in front of her.

There wasn't a big 'I can't believe that was under there' moment for Sakura, instead it was more like seeing the entire puzzle when a center piece had been missing. She was not surprised to note that Kakashi was handsome like she had always suspected but it was shocking that his mouth, nose, and chin made him look much younger than his eyes had ever revealed. There was also this uncanny lift to the corner of his mouth that seemed to hint at mischief but for the time being that was subdued.

"Now yours."

She hesitated. But her time being in ANBU was over; it was time to go back to being Sakura Haruno again. Sakura slipped the mask off and placed it delicately on the ground. Kakashi took a step forward, closing what little space remained between, and brought his gloved hand up to cup her cheek.

"No, this mask." He swiped his thumb across her cheekbone.

Her eyes widened in surprise and then her defenses began to crumble away. Sakura gripped the hand at her cheek hard, her searing green eyes boring into his.

"I've changed so much. The world beyond these borders is fracturing, screaming out in pain no matter where you look. People have been suffering much worse than us and I all I did was complain, stay weak." Kakashi remained silent. He noticed however how her eyes had changed once again. Before she left there was despair and fear, but the Sakura in front of him now was determined and her eyes were hardened by experience.

"I promise never again to be a person who watches the backs of others. Not you or Naruto will have to protect me." Sakura paused and inhaled deeply to calm her nerves before saying what she really struggled to say to him.

"Kakashi, I don't need you to be another weakness. I need your strength. But above all I need you. Whoever you were in the past and all the anger and pain you've suffered; the man you are today, I want all of him. Hold nothing back from me." Sakura finished seriously.

She kept her head down, choosing to look at their joined hands. It felt right, as if the world had suddenly become peaceful and still when their hands clasped each other. Kakashi remained silent before her and that's why she was afraid to look at his face to see the rejection there or anger or even disappointment. She wasn't sure which was worse.

Sakura chanced a look anyways. Her eyes slowly rose up his face, past his thinly pressed lips, his angular nose, and to the most telling part of his thoughts, his eyes. The coal and crimson mixture she was well acquainted with but what was completely foreign to her, was how he was looking at her. There was intent in his eyes, a seriousness marked by the way his brows creased together and possibly slight nervousness that she had to admit for once made him seem inexperienced.

"Sakura…if it means being a part of your strength, then I'm yours." He answered and gave her a small grin at his very corny line. Sakura, who had been holding in a breath, released it with her own smile and small chuckle. She decided then that that grin would be seen a lot more of by her, it was too charming to keep hidden by that terrible piece of material. Her joined hand let go of his and this time it was her reaching for his face. Sakura very gently laid her palm on his jaw.

"Hey you know it's kinda unfair that you hid this face from me for so long." She said more in wonderment than actual accusation. Kakashi responded by wrapping his arm securely around her waist and pulling her against him.

"Well consider how lucky you are to be the only one who will see it."

"True. But first I really need to do this."

Sakura stepped up on her toes and tilted her lips to his. Without needing further invitation, Kakashi firmly molded his lips to hers, gently coaxing her mouth open with a sweep of his tongue. Their tongues met in the cavern of her mouth and made slow sweeps against one another. Her hands moved automatically, one to his shoulder to hold herself up at his height better and the other to snake through his hair.

Kakashi immediately recognized her difficulty matching his height and with the hand not wrapped around her waist, he ran the length under her thigh and prompted her to wrap herself around him. Sakura did exactly that with ease, not breaking from the kiss to jump up and hug his waist with her legs.

His arms went to her back to keep her close and help support some of her weight. Right when his hands grasped down, Sakura let out a hiss and arched her back away from Kakashi's hands in pain.

Kakashi let go quickly and Sakura stood upright on her own two feet.

"Sakura?" He said her name timidly, afraid he'd done something wrong.

Sakura held out a hand to stop him before those thoughts could take hold. "Sorry, it's just that I was injured recently there."

She gave a grin, trying to downplay the entire issue but Kakashi still had a worried look. Sighing once, Sakura brought up her hand and held it to her back as well as she could manage then pumped chakra into the wound.

"See? All better! Let's have none of that." She reached over and smoothed his eyebrows with her fingers.

It didn't help soften his features. Sadly, she realized that making him not worry would take a lot of training on her part or at least better lying. But the most she could do now was convince him she was in perfect working order and with that Sakura, much to Kakashi's surprise, pulled his mask back over the lower half of his face. She quickly collected her discarded mask and ran to the edge of the forest clearing, in the direction of Konoha.

"Race you back?" She goaded him.

Now Kakashi was quite used to being challenged and if his history with Gai were any indication, the infamous Copy-nin never backed down no matter how childish or ridiculous the competition was. So Kakashi merely smirked at his new partner and joined her at the starting line.

"Oh by the way, I should mention that the stakes of this race are loser has to tell Naruto we're dating!" Sakura didn't even finish her statement before shooting out like a bullet into the surrounding greenery. Kakashi didn't feel it necessary to mention that him requesting to escort Sakura back home was already an admittance to the Hokage about his feelings for her. But nonetheless he donned his mask and made chase after his Sakura.

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A/N: So it's been awhile since I've updated but hopefully you enjoy this chapter. Oh btw I've given up on formatting these things, it never lets me do large spaces :(


	11. Marraige in Books

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, if that were true then my Japanese would be much better.

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Sakura leaned forward precariously on the arm of the couch to get a better view of the bookcase. Every time she was sure that the books on the shelves had found their proper place there was something off about the overall look.

It never occurred to her before that the placement of books on a shelf was this tedious. They could be arranged by height, alphabetically, topic, and in Sakura's case practicality.

Practicality seemed an awfully strange way of organizing them but she figured any other way would have the owner of said bookshelf complaining. But it was a difficult task to add her medical textbooks to the already carefully housed _Icha Icha_ novels.

And contrary to what most believed, Kakashi did read more than his porn, although that never happened in the public eye. But here in his apartment there was homage to many different authors that spanned a variety of different genres. Another reason this task was exceedingly difficult.

Sakura sighed in annoyance but carried on pulling certain books and replacing others. One of her own text she pulled off the shelf and placed on her lap. Without thinking she flipped through the pages and soon was engrossed.

She smiled fondly at her own writing in the margins of the pages. Small notes dotted the sides about interesting facts or important things to remember. She realized this must have been one of the first medical textbooks she studied since there were a lot more questions around the printed words. Things she had not understood at the time but could now recite in her sleep.

She closed the textbook and placed it aside, taking up a small picture book instead. The first time Sakura had seen this she was shocked. The great Copy nin owned a children's nursery book. Turns out it was one of the last mementos of his mother that Kakashi owned. The book had been read to him as a child by his mother, making it quite worthy of the middle shelf, front and center. Delicately, she put the book back to its former place.

Maybe it would be better to buy another bookcase.

Looking around, Sakura knew that was impossible with the limited space. She ran her hand across the spines of the books already shelved. It wasn't about getting rid of books, how could she when each one had been much loved and enjoyed by herself or Kakashi? Once more she sighed.

Hearing that sign for the umpteenth time, said man poked his head out from the kitchen where he had resigned to finish late mission reports.

"Sakura, are you finished?" He asked.

She looked up from another book she had pulled from the shelf. Kakashi stood there waiting for her response. Tilting her head in his direction she had to smile at his casual pose against the door jam made better by his maskless glory that included slight stubble on his jaw.

But Sakura soon remembered why she had sentenced him to the kitchen in the first place.

"Are you?" She retorted back. He turned sheepish knowing she meant his overdue work. One look at him sent Sakura into a tirade.

"KA-KA-SHI. If you don't finish those reports today, who do you think the Hokage will come and pester? 'Sakura-chaaaaan make Kakashi-sensei do his work, stooooop distracting hiiiiim!'" Sakura mimicked Naruto's nagging voice and directed a glare at the lazy man.

"But I was only-"

He stopped mid-sentence as a kunai hurtled through the air and landed with a thunk in the door jam splintering the wood. He glanced at the kunai a hairs breadth from his cheek and back to the kunoichi sitting on the arm of the couch.

Sakura had her attention directed on the bookcase and it seemed as if she never moved to throw the deadly weapon. Of course Kakashi knew better. He also knew when to retreat, so he returned to the kitchen table without another word and hunkered down, intent on finishing the mess of paper before him.

Sakura looked at her handiwork on the middle shelf. There was his favourite _Icha Icha_ unfortunately displayed. Next to that were two medical tomes that she had received as gifts from a daimyo after doing an important ANBU mission for him and the other was from Tsunade after her apprenticeship had concluded. Both were very old and bound by leather.

Next to that was a sort of suturing for idiots book Sakura had bought as a joke, just so Kakashi would see it and maybe think to improve his basic medical training since he liked to come home hurt after every mission.

A spot had been left opened for the book she was currently flipping through. It was the Konoha Shinobi Rule Book. This was a staple at the beginning and throughout each shinobi's career and it was equally up to that person whether or not to adhere to it.

The first rule, considered most important by being listed first out of hundreds was: _a shinobi must always put the mission first._

If you were able to do this then all the other rules could technically be bent.

Sakura always wondered what effect having that as an unbreakable rule would have on her fellow brethren. Surely Itachi Uchiha could testify that this had been the one and only constant in his life. But just as surely, the man in the kitchen right now would add the amendment that the mission came first but you should never abandon teammates to complete it. Then Naruto would undoubtedly believe that the first rule should be never give up on your mission, regardless of how difficult it might be.

Even Sasuke would have changed the rule, his would've been absolutely complete the mission of the heart, no matter how destructive or harmful it may be.

But what was her so called 'way of the ninja'? When she first read the rule book everything was taken at face value in her childish mind but now with all the experiences and years behind her, did she really see the same thing as written on those pages?

With that thought Sakura flopped backwards onto the couch in annoyance. She grasped the manual close to her chest and turned her head to the right. In her line of site was a mantle filled with framed photos accumulated by Kakashi over his lifetime. Among them were the three teams Kakashi had been a member of. The oldest was of his genin team that Sakura had never known and included Naruto's father.

Then there was the original team seven in all their glory. Only the second the camera shutter clicked would they ever be considered a whole or successful squad. The photo always made her melancholy despite the time and grief that had long since passed.

Finally, was a photo of team Kakashi; Naruto, Sai, Yamato, Kakashi, and she had smiled gloriously that day as Tsunade snapped the picture of them. Immediately after, Sai had made a rude comment about Naruto which led to a brawl that Yamato found himself caught in the middle of. The rest of them just stood to the side and placed bets on the boys antics which Tsunade inevitably lost.

Sakura smiled to herself at the fond memory. Among those three photos were numerous others of friends. One contained the entirety of the Jonin senseis sitting around a table probably at Elements, Asuma had his arm slung around Kurenai and Gai was in the back giving a pose probably to show his "youthful" personality.

The first time Sakura had visited Kakashi's home she was surprised that he was the sentimental type to keep photos. But at the same time she was already planning to make the mantle. That's why on his thirty-seventh birthday she gave him a silver framed photo of the two of them taken by Yamato. In the photo Kakashi had wrapped his arms snuggly around Sakura's front while his head rested in the crook of her neck. Both had smiled like idiots at the camera.

By far it was her favourite photograph and although Kakashi wasn't one to actually show big displays of affection, he had rearranged the mantle and placed their picture right in the middle.

Sakura sighed happily this time.

She looked once more at the rule book in her hands and thought of one particular rule, something Kakashi was quite fond of; the underneath the underneath. The bookcase should've been easier to compile but it wasn't about organizing things into a proper manner. Every single book they owned told a story of the person it belonged to and putting those books together on a shelf was trying to join two completely different people on one plane.

She wasn't afraid of the commitment but it a precious process that could not be rushed.

There was a shuffling of feet on the floor and Sakura turned to the back of the couch. Four paws and a small tail hovered above her head in the form of Pakkun. Two hands curled around his body, preventing the pup from falling on Sakura's face. She could just see the points of silver hair around the pug's unhappy face.

"If he doesn't put me down, I'll start biting." Pakkun said not at all amused at his current position.

Sakura gently took the dog from Kakashi's hands and set him on the floor.

"Sorry Pakkun, he's bored. You can go now."

"I thought when he's bored you're supposed to play with him, not me?" The pug inquired.

Sakura blushed at the insinuation.

"Doesn't exactly work that way." She managed to spit out. Pakkun shrugged his shoulders and poofed away.

Sakura, still lying on part of the couch, looked up at an expression of extreme happiness. Which meant Kakashi was trying to distract her from the fact he was still not finished his work. He continued to stare down at her without saying anything.

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"How's it going?" He gestured with his head to the bookcase.

Sakura groaned and turned away from his face and back to the mantle. Those pictures mixed together effortlessly despite the different people and atmosphere of each one, why couldn't she do it as easily?

"It's not." She finally replied after a minute.

Kakashi was instantly alerted to the glumness in her voice. He had known her a long time and he was familiar with that tone. It was one of extreme frustration and only used when Sakura was struggling to comprehend something. Usually it was reserved for jutsus or complicated medical procedures but there had been a few times when it related to something else.

He made his way around to the front of the couch and sat down on the edge in front of her legs, looking over at the mantle. Over the years Kakashi had managed to catch glimpses of happiness in this life. It wasn't such an easy task considering their ways but he had done it.

However, the best addition to his collection was strangely not taken by him. The photo of Sakura and himself was by far his favourite. He and Sakura did not seem like an obvious combination but as ninjas being unassuming worked just fine for the pair.

Having promoted Sakura to bring some of her books over was an attempt on his part to somehow increase the degree of their relationship. He worried that she would be unhappy without a substantial commitment or offering on his part to integrate her into his life more. Having her with him day by day didn't seem like such a crazy idea anymore.

"You could always move in."

Sakura's head whipped up so fast it was a miracle it didn't strain. She balked at his overly calm form. Legs shoulder length apart, arms resting on each thigh, and hands clasped together. They had never broached the subject of living together. Naturally nights were spent at each other's places or days off like this and there was an accumulation of Sakura's things at his place, hence the bookcase. But beyond that it hadn't been a consideration. Something so normal, moving in together, had never crossed her mind before.

Why hadn't it?

It was most certainly an option and would save time to only have to keep up one home instead of dividing her time between two. But if the bookcase was any indication, how could she possibly integrate herself fully into Kakashi's life?

"I can't even mix our books properly, fat chance anything else will be easier." She muttered more to herself than him.

Silently, Kakashi grasped her small hand in his. Her skin was rough and calloused much like his own and he thought how sad that it wasn't smooth and blemish free as she deserved flawless skin. But that wasn't his Sakura, she was a fighter until the end and would bear the marks of that proudly.

Sakura looked at their hands and then sought out his face. His eyes met hers and like countless times before, his stare seemed to say he knew there was more to it than that and whatever she was trying to hide he would understand. Kakashi gave her hand a reassuring squeeze to say whatever it was.

"I think it would be too painful. More than ever there is a chance when we leave home we won't be coming back. I… I couldn't bear to live in a home that we both shared, had created unforgettable memories in if you weren't here to make more. It would feel empty and every day would be a constant reminder to that loss of you."

Sakura's eyes started to pool with tears. Kakashi immediately gathered her up in his arms and held her close. A light dawned in her head. They couldn't have a relationship like everyone else because they are shinobi first and in love second.

"I don't think you could bear it either." She whispered into his chest.

He held her tighter and thought clearly about those words.

"I couldn't." He said resolutely.

He knew she was right, absolutely. It would be beyond torture to live here with her every day and then suddenly be left all alone. The years had hardened Sakura but for Kakashi she was the only brightness in his life and if she were gone there was little doubt that the darkness would creep back in.

Immediately she regretted mentioning the possibility of losing each other. The look on Kakashi's face was enough to make her heart clench painfully. He was trying to imagine this entirely possible future. How Naruto would pay him a personal visit and try to say in the simplest words that she had died and knowing Kakashi's response Naruto would bring ANBU with him to subdue the distressed Copy nin. But it would not be enough and his unbelievably sad face said it never would be.

Gingerly, Sakura brushed her thumb over his scrunched forehead. Kakashi looked at her and smiled sadly at her attempt to bring him back to reality.

"Sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up." She bowed her head in apology and wiped away the last of her tears.

She felt Kakashi shift underneath her and was shortly placed off to the side of the couch. Sakura watched him move away from her and stand in front of the bookcase she had spent the greater part of the day organizing.

With his back to her she couldn't see his expression but Sakura saw him slowly trail his fingers over each book on the middle shelf. His hand stilled over one book.

"Suturing for dummies?" He asked coolly without looking over his shoulder.

Sakura's eyes widened in surprise and unable to help it, a small giggle left her lips. She stood up and went to Kakashi's side.

"Don't take it to heart. I just think your skill needs improvement." Sakura teased.

His arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer.

"I thought that's why I have you?"

Sakura poked his side playfully and let his teasing go unanswered.

The couple lapsed into silence as they both stared at the books on the shelf. Sakura couldn't help but remember the first time she saw the man next to her hidden behind that orange cover. If only she knew then that she would become romantically involved with her perverted sensei.

Kakashi thoughts followed the same tangent. When he was twenty-four there was no indication or want for what he and Sakura would become, what they are now. But time had passed rapidly and the woman he kept close to his side had managed to be on equal levels with him and completely surpassing him on others.

Sakura was not weak, in fact she is probably the best study of shinobi in Konoha and could copy anyone's technique with her expert chakra control. That had long since earned her the name Neo-Copy nin. But perhaps her greatest show of strength was the ability to heal. Sakura had a tendency to mend the people around her and Kakashi knew she did it in more ways than one.

"It looks good." He settled on saying.

"Yeah it does, kind of like a marriage in books." Sakura responded and looked up at him smiling.

Kakashi returned her smile and dipped his head down to meet hers. He kissed her deeply and both felt perfectly content with this cover to cover relationship they had created.

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A/N: I haven't updated in forever but with school and everything it just has not been possible. Hopefully I'll be able to post more soon. Sorry for the wait!


	12. This is Goodbye

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto but at least pretend I'm some sort of successful author.

Naruto was wary when Sakura entered his office and immediately knelt before him. She had never done this even after his appointment to Hokage. He warily walked to the front of his desk to view her better. Sakura was dressed in ANBU armour appropriate since her recent promotion but most surprisingly her identifiable pink hair was black. He hoped it was only a henge and not dye.

"Hokage-sama."

Sakura kept her head bowed to the ground and spoke purposefully in a formal matter, after all to her this was a formal meeting. The Hokage steeled himself for whatever Sakura would say next. He knew he wasn't going to like it.

"As you are aware I was recently promoted to the ANBU ranks and I thank you for your support in that matter. Now that I am in ANBU, I request that I be allowed to work outside the village."

Naruto paled considerably. This wasn't the first time ANBU had requested to become out of state but he never imagined Sakura would ask the leave the village behind. He was sure of her abilities but not of her reasoning.

"For how long?" He dared to ask.

"Long."

She lifted her head and pinned him with a stare. In her eyes was determination but for the first time he saw desperation and helplessness and it stole his breath away. Never before had she looked at him that way and he unfairly wished she hadn't.

Naruto went to her and pulled her up by the shoulders. Their eyes remained locked.

"Sakura, why?" His voice colored with confusion.

She absolutely hated making Naruto sad, especially now that he was Hokage. The man that every person in the village looked to for support including her. She didn't want to let him down. There was a strength in her childhood friend, one that was forged by misery and by perseverance. All she had right now was misery and she would do anything to have his kind of strength.

"Naruto, you are a precious person to me, someone I cannot live without. I want to be able to protect you and everyone else in the village. But as I am now it is not enough. The thoughts and feelings I carry with me of the past and the uncertainty of the future makes me weak. Ninja aren't supposed to be weak."

He could see how she was fighting an internal demon, something he was all too familiar with. He didn't understand why his friend and family had become endowed with this much pain and he was too old to think it had something to do with Sasuke now. Sakura surprised him by placing her hand on his cheek in a loving gesture.

"Please let me go." Her voice was earnest and it cut like crystals.

Naruto hung his head in defeat. Though he was the Hokage and had the Kyuubi, this one woman could pretty much get him to do anything without fail.

"Okay. But you are to report weekly to me with a messenger pigeon and I will send you missions the same way." He said with his last modicum of authority.

"I'd like to leave tomorrow at first light."

Naruto simply nodded as he returned to his much worn chair. He picked up a mission scroll from his desk and threw it lightly towards her. Originally, he was going to assign the mission to Kakashi because of its rank and it required someone to be dispatched immediately. He had only just sat down to read the mission request before Sakura came in.

She accepted the scroll graciously and saluted Naruto. They each took one last look at the other. Both knew this was goodbye.

"Naruto you better be married by the time I get back." Sakura smiled and winked at her best friend then moved swiftly out the door.

Without pause she flew down the stairs of the Hokage building and rushed to breathe in the night air. She went through the double doors not thinking to slow down. Unfortunately, she hit somebody almost immediately after exiting the building in her haste. Sakura stepped away from the rigid chest of a man only to look up and see silver hair and an orange book.

"Kakashi."

The exact person she did not want to see.

Kakashi scrutinized her harried appearance and knew something was up. He couldn't exactly act friendly after their last encounter had been a disaster. Somehow the two had both been able to expertly avoid each other since.

She was anxious to get away from him. They hadn't spoken in quite some time not since the day at the cenotaph. Unbeknownst to her she had caught sight of the Copy-nin at a sensitive moment as he stood in front of the immortalized names of the dead. She had approached him and after words were exchanged Kakashi had grabbed her up in his arms and kissed her suddenly.

When he broke away from the kiss, a messenger appeared to collect Sakura. She wasn't able to say anything before being taken to Naruto and finding out she had made ANBU. That was almost three weeks ago. And now she was planning to leave the village indefinitely.

"Sorry I have a mission." She hastily explained. Sakura flashed the scroll so he could see before taking off onto the rooftops towards her apartment.

Kakashi remained standing alone in front of the Hokage's office with clenched fists. He hated himself for what he did to her that day. He hadn't planned to kiss her but when she came up to him all he could think was how much he wanted to tell her everything. All the things from his past that he was afraid for other people to know. Except her.

Kakashi had no idea when these feelings had developed but it was because of their friendship that he had got a second chance to know her and really know her. He went and ruined that now. There was no way Sakura would be able to look past this indiscretion of his. At best he hoped they would be able to stand next to each other long enough to say more than they're going on a mission.

Speaking of a mission he had been summoned by the Hokage for an important one and though he was usually late this seemed too urgent to ignore. Kakashi banished thoughts of her from his mind as he jumped up to the open window of the Hokage's office and was met by an unhappy Naruto.

"I told you to use the door." He said sullenly.

Kakashi moved to stand in front of Naruto instead of hanging from his window. When he got a look at the young Hokage's face he knew something was wrong. Naruto looked stressed and worried, not a common mixture for him which tipped the Copy-nin off.

"What is it Naruto?" His voice serious.

Naruto palmed his forehead and refused to look his former teacher in the eye. He had let another part of the team leave. There was no way to communicate this failure to his esteemed sensei.

"I don't have a mission for you Kakashi-sensei, you're free to leave."

Knowing Naruto wasn't about to offer free information, Kakashi took a second to analyze and process the situation he was in. He had been summoned for a mission but now there wasn't one for him. Sakura had been here only minutes before to see Naruto and she had a mission scroll. And she is the only one who can make the Hokage worried like this. Something had to have happened for Naruto to give Sakura the mission intended for him and it was something big to give Naruto such a pained look.

"Naruto, what happened with Sakura?"

He twitched and rose his head slowly. Obviously Kakashi figured out this much somehow. Naruto wouldn't be able to keep the news from him forever and he knew that his teacher deserved to hear it from him first.

"I'm sorry Kakashi-sensei I couldn't get her to stay."

"What do you mean? She said there was a mission, won't she be back in a week?"

Naruto silently shook his head.

"This is only the first of many. Sakura, she wants to remain in the field and it might be a long time before we see her again."

Kakashi remained composed at the shocking news. All that he could think of was the time after she tried to hunt down Sasuke and how she blamed himself and Naruto for leaving her behind in this village. Was she trying to get even with him after everything?

"When is she leaving?"

Naruto turned towards his window and watched a creeping sun trying to take back the night sky.

"Now."

He heard a flurry of wind from the front of the desk. Naruto turned back to see the remnants of Kakashi's teleportation jutsu. It didn't matter if his sensei reached Sakura in time there was no way of changing her mind. Reluctantly, Naruto believed his departing friend was trying to reclaim something she had lost or despite what he believed, never had. His sister needed to have the chance to support herself and be the ninja she wanted to become.

* * *

After picking up her already prepared pack from her apartment, Sakura zoomed through the village towards the gates of Konoha. Once close enough to the entrance she dropped down onto the paved road below to take one last walk through her village. This wonderful home she had grown up in and was leaving for the first time completely on her own. The thought was a little scary but Sakura had already come to the conclusion that this is exactly how she will be able to overcome the one thing that has always held her back.

Without weakness she could proudly say she was best friends and even family with the Hokage. Or finally take the position of supervisory medic of the entire hospital. Or maybe one day allow herself to be happy with the person she knew she loved but would never admit to.

These shadows of the past that overcast her entire life refused to leave and the guilt and self-loathing Sakura had been able to hide prevented her from moving on.

In her mind she was stronger but in her heart she was still twelve and hoping everything would be okay.

Her hand tightened on the ANBU mask she carried. Painted on the week before were red cherry blossom petals made to look like tears falling from the right eye. It was a promise and a reminder that while she wore this mask and uniform these would be the only tears shed.

Sakura continued down the path with this new resolve. Without warning the leaves of trees along the pathway rustled from a sudden breeze and she could feel the faintest brush of chakra with it. Sakura paused mid-stride as a new presence fully manifested from a teleportation jutsu.

Naruto ratted her out. Bits of her wanted to laugh at thinking of having a clean getaway and bits wanted to wring Naruto's neck for telling her pursuer that she was leaving. There was no other explanation for why Kakashi would be meters behind her other than the Hokage. Walking away from the village wouldn't be so easy after a confrontation with him.

And how could she tell Kakashi that he wasn't the reason for her leaving and actually have him believe her?

Sakura made a choice as she carefully set her mask over her face. She had to be brutal and she had to be honest for him to let her go.

"I could forgive you."

A/N: I have a definite direction I want this story of snapshots to go in and I have several working chapters and even an ending in progress but I have no idea if there are specific ideas for chapters I've exhausted :p Stay tuned!


	13. Origins

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto... but I'm working on it MUHAHAHAHA!

"Dad?"

Naruto mentally groaned before looking up from a mission scroll to his eldest daughter. Unfortunately for him, she was a renowned brainiac so unlike himself and more akin to Hinata, and had recently taken to asking questions about the opposite sex. He knew she was well into her teens and naturally these types of topics came up. But he hated to discuss male-female relations with his innocent although deadly daughter.

Regardless, he was her father and would always be there for her, even during the awkward teenage years. Naruto folded his scroll closed on the family kitchen table and looked at her expectantly to continue.

"Well I kind of have a personal question…" She trailed off nervously and scratched the back of her head in a way very reminiscent of Naruto's embarrassed self.

He paled at the oncoming question and braced himself for impact. Silently, Naruto wished she had also gained her mother's shyness if not tact.

"And?" He prompted.

"I just don't understand!" She yelled angrily.

Naruto leaned away in his chair at the uncharacteristic shout, he expected some sort of physical hit to follow such an angry voice. Then he felt silly because this was his daughter and not his wife discovering he hadn't done the dishes. Or a certain pinkette from his past who hit him every chance she got.

"I'm the first child of three. The oldest. I know you had lots of important people in your life and that's why you honored grandpa by naming Minato-kun after him and it was the same with Jiraiya-kun. But what's up with my name!? I've checked the village records and there is no one in your past with my name!"

His precious daughter's face flushed red with anger and he couldn't help but grin. This really didn't assuage her anger any but Naruto was quick to take an authoritative tone anyways.

"My records are sealed first of all with some very powerful jutsus which means that it's confidential. As in not for your eyes."

His daughter was quick to rebut. "Oh please, those jutsus were child's play if you really wanted to keep the file secret you could've tried harder. And don't try to change the subject, father."

Parental pride swelled in his chest at his daughter's blatant disregard for the rules and superior shinobi skills. Although he couldn't exactly condone the behavior, Naruto held up his hands in surrender and motioned for her to sit down. His face turned serious. She was instantly nervous at seeing her father not as his usual smiling self.

"The truth is…. When I was younger there was this mission to cotton country and I met this amazing cook. I was young and stupid and didn't really know what overeating meant. Anyways he had this specialty ramen so incredible that I promised to name my first born after it. So I named you-"

"Naruto!"

The Hokage visibly gulped and a look of sheer terror came over his face at hearing his wife's stern tone. He mustered his courage and turned around to look at his beautiful Hinata standing at the entrance of the kitchen. Her face was confident and had a no non-sense air about her. Raising their children had finally allowed her to overcome her shyness and was not afraid to lay down the rules with him.

"Hi honey!" Naruto smiled grandly at her and because she could never refuse his smile, Hinata's face softened. But she wouldn't let him off that easy for playing tricks on their daughter.

"Stop lying to our daughter. Look at her!"

Naruto turned back around and was met with a very scary look that rivaled Ino's. He kept smiling to hide his fear and patted his daughter on the head to placate her.

"Okay I'll tell you the actual story behind your name." Naruto said happily.

His daughter continued to glare at him.

"If you lie this time I'll stop sparring with you." She wisely threatened.

It was no secret to the family or the village for that matter that Naruto treasured and prided himself on teaching his three children the ninja arts. Naruto could already picture his daughter as Hokage or an ANBU captain when she was older. But not without his excellent tutelage.

Even if that included throwing kunai at them while they slept.

"Alright for real this time. Your brothers as you know were named after my mentor and my father. These men were true shinobi and irreplaceable family in my heart so I had to name my sons after them. I could have named you, my first child, after one of them too but it wasn't the right time."

Hinata came up behind Naruto and placed her small hands on his shoulders to offer comfort. After sixteen years he still had a more difficult time discussing those two than any of the other people he had lost and for good reason after what they gave to him. Naruto appreciated his wife's comfort and smiled under her touch before continuing.

"My old team, before I became Hokage were my surrogate family. I'm sure you've seen the picture of them in my office." His daughter nodded her head in recognition, having been watched over by uncle Yamato her entire life and then there was uncle Sai who had been her genin team leader until she made Chunin.

"But I've never much mentioned the female on my team or our leader, mostly because they passed away a few months before you were born. It wasn't fair not to talk about them…they were a part of my original genin team." Naruto paused to let the momentary grief pass before continuing.

"Sakura and Kakashi saved my life at the end of the last great shinobi war. They are especially important to me, just as you are. One day I will tell you everything about their relationship and history but just for now I'll tell you that those two never wished to be separated. So I named you after both of them because they meant the world to me and I didn't want them to be apart."

Naruto smiled fondly at their memory. It still saddened him that they couldn't be here to see how the world changed or see his beautiful children or even retire to that small cottage in Fire country.

Still, when Naruto thought of Sakura she was always smiling brightly and encouraging him to never give up on his dreams, and Kakashi would stand at her side with his usual eye-crinkle smile, telling him to dust himself off and try again. They gave their lives to him. So he would continue to smile in their places and for this precious life he had been able to live.

Naruto watched his daughter carefully as she digested this new information. Obviously she wasn't expecting such an incredible reason behind her name. Her hands were neatly folded in front of her and none of the anger from before remained. Her head was bowed and Naruto was afraid she may be upset.

"I see." She managed to say through tight lips. Then she looked to her mother still standing behind him.

"Mom we should probably go pick the boys up from the academy now." Hinata looked up at the clock in the kitchen and gasped in surprise by how late it was already.

"I'll grab our coats!" She yelled as she sprinted from the room.

Naruto eyes stayed glued to his daughter as she stood up and moved silently to his side. Without warning she threw her arms around his neck like she had done at a younger age when he would carry her to bed. At least before he started throwing shuriken at her while she slept.

"Thanks dad, I'm glad you named me after them." She quickly let go and bounded out of the room.

Naruto smiled to himself at her unusual display of affection since she was now a teenager and all. A rush of steps came towards his direction and he was not surprised to see his daughter come back into the kitchen.

"You know I think you're a great ninja and all but age must be getting to you because I placed one of uncle Sai's explosive tags on your back and you haven't seemed to notice." She admitted while beaming one of her best smiles his way.

Naruto was also smiling as he reached around his side to feel the paper explosive with his hand. That's when his smile chipped at the realization that she managed to get him with a highly dangerous explosive…again. Another second passed before his daughter turned away and ran away as fast as her legs could take her.

"KASURA UZUMAKI!" He bellowed down the hallway.

* * *

A/N: I know a few people might think I spoiled the ending of this fanfic or something, but I promise there's more to it than that! And the actual ending will be unexpected? At least to a degree... ;)


	14. Their Bad Habits

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto but one day I'll have my own story people will write fanfiction about

Her Bad Habit

Chalk it up to nervous energy or restlessness or even a change in routine, but Sakura found herself running laps around the village's perimeter at two in the morning while it poured freezing rain. And lately she found herself doing this every night the sky decided to cry.

On her fourth lap she slowed and paused to catch her breath. Her lungs tried to expand past her rib cage to keep up with the physical exertion and it truly was a wonderful feeling. Small puffs of air left her mouth to mix with the streaming water.

Only fifteen minutes before she had been lying in bed next to Kakashi. The patter of rain on the window and roof woke her up from an otherwise sound sleep. She had stared at the ceiling for a while before this melancholic, restless feeling overcame her, the same one that always emerged when it rained and the world outside turned dark. Next to her, Kakashi continued to sleep, and she watched the comforting rise and fall of his chest.

But it wasn't enough to calm her mind from itching to get up and move.

Sakura had stealthily got out of bed and threw on some random clothes before taking off into the streets of Konoha.

She resumed her run after the small pause at full speed to complete lap number five. The still sleeping village passed by in a blur, whether that was because of her speed or the hazy rain, she wasn't entirely sure. Her body went through all the motions and knew the perimeter of the village by heart and this was what allowed her mind to wander.

This bad habit of running in the rain she couldn't seem to escape. It always started with that feeling in bed and it seemed like burning energy was the only way to cure it. But as soon as she got out here and ran these laps the feeling only grew and then it became something akin to despair. This irked her, so Sakura ran faster, seemingly trying to escape from her own thoughts.

She was anxious.

Whenever she saw Naruto he spoke in hushed words of war. Kakashi kept leaving the village for "special missions" on her best friend's request. Ino spent an inordinate amount of time in the interrogation department and her mood seemed to worsen every time she saw her. It seemed like the only constant, stable thing in her life right now was her feet hitting the pavement and the rain falling from overhead.

After another six laps, Sakura began to exhaust and pushed herself just a bit more until she was back at Kakashi's apartment.

She silently slipped in the front door and hurriedly ran to the bathroom. There she stripped her soaked through clothes and grabbed one of the faded blue towels to dry off. Sakura retraced her steps to the door and thoroughly began drying the floor where water had dripped. Once it for sure dried, she threw her clothes and the wet towel into a hamper and prayed Kakashi wouldn't suddenly decide to do laundry the next day.

Sakura finally tiptoed back into the bedroom. Kakashi was still asleep on the bed where she had left him earlier. She grabbed around until she found a shirt to slip on over her nude body and climbed back into the warm bed. An arm fell around her waist and Sakura was pulled backwards into Kakashi's chest.

She smiled at the action and finally felt restful enough to sleep and hoped the rain would stop by morning.

* * *

The next night Sakura found herself racing around in the dark as water pelted her in a steady rhythm from above. She was exhausted. A second night of rain fall made her restless and once again she was out in the middle of the night trying to quell the feeling.

Sakura slowed to a stop back at Kakashi's apartment and breathed a sigh of relief at working out her frustration. Once again she slipped inside but the light of a living room lamp shocked her into stillness.

Surprising her even more was the man standing there, the one she had snuck out of bed from twenty minutes earlier. He had been waiting for her to return. Kakashi's mask wasn't on but he wore a face of indifference anyways, it revealed nothing about discovering her absence. She didn't know what to say or even why she felt incredibly guilty.

"Sorry." She gave a weak smile.

He didn't respond, instead Kakashi stepped towards her. Sakura kept her eyes glued on the small puddle of water collecting around her and just when she thought he might actually be very angry; the weight of a towel fell on her.

Before she could act, her hair was messily dried by him. Once he seemed satisfied with her hair, Kakashi moved on to the exposed skin on her arms and legs. Finally, he wrapped her in a different towel that was twice her size. Kakashi grabbed one of her hands and started to lead her back to the bedroom. Sakura took a fleeting glance back at the puddle still on the ground then cast her eyes on his face, which still didn't show any sign of emotion.

"I'm sorry Kakashi. I hope I didn't ruin the floor."

He turned back to her with a small smile that made her think he was relieved just hearing her stupid comment. She realized he must have been quite worried to wake up in the middle of the night and realize she wasn't there.

Kakashi brought his hand up and brushed away a stray piece of hair from her face. His hand lingered and warmed her ice cold cheek.

"Next time, please bring a jacket."

…

…

…

She wondered how long he had known about her bad habit.

His Bad Habit

Kakashi definitely changed his lifestyle to accommodate his relationship with Sakura. All it really meant was instead of coming home from a mission and passing out immediately from untreated wounds, he pretended to be fine while he spent the night or day finally back at home with her. At least until she found out about his injuries and threatened to kill him for being stupid.

And this cycle would repeat after a day or a few days or maybe after six hours when a new mission would be assigned.

This was his life for almost a year now. Kakashi didn't have any complaints. He thoroughly enjoyed coming home and knowing that there was someone waiting for him, who was worried whether or not he made it through those gates after every mission.

But it also meant there were fewer opportunities to visit his old comrades. Recently he had devised a way to get around this by visiting the cenotaph in the middle of the night when it rained. It wasn't because he felt like being sad and have the rain echo these thoughts but the rain did provide a convenient sound barrier when he snuck out of his apartment unbeknownst to his sleeping kunoichi.

Kakashi had done just that almost an hour ago. He now stood in front of the glistening rock with rain coming down in drips from the points of his hair to splash against the names of the dead. Obito, Minato, Rin, and Asuma were the people he came to visit.

His fingers ghosted their names and thought about what it meant to be where he was. It was cold and wet, and Naruto talked about war openly with him every day it seemed, but Kakashi could only think about the woman at home in his bed with those shy smiles that only he saw.

He wished he could be honest with Sakura about why he secretly visited the cenotaph while she slept. Kakashi had kept this one thing from her since they became involved. Actually he hadn't told anyone about this particular bad habit. But reconciling his conflicting feelings of guilt about the past and the happiness he felt now was no simple task.

What would his old team say about this?

Asuma would surely support him, maybe even hint at allowing him to tell Sakura everything about himself once and for all. How would Rin respond though? She would be angry, for choosing another medic over her though she would never admit it. Minato would be disappointed in his choice of someone so much younger than himself and the same age as his own son. His harshest critic of all would be Obito, his bubbly and carefree personality would definitely blame him for corrupting the beautiful Sakura.

No. He would never let anyone say those things about Sakura or himself. Kakashi abruptly turned away from the stone and headed towards his home.

These constant warring thoughts left him relieved that he would never have to explain why he was with Sakura to his dearly departed, but so much guilt followed that sentiment.

He flew through the village and landed soundlessly at his door step. He entered his home and tried his best not to let water fall onto the floor as he made his way to the bathroom. Kakashi pulled off his mask and wrung it out over the sink. A look in the mirror confirmed he looked tired and pitiful, a lost pup found drowned out in the rain. He sighed then tried his best to dry his unruly hair plastered around his face.

Kakashi left the bathroom and quickly retraced his steps down the hall, drying the floor with a towel under foot. Once it was all dry, he disposed of the towel and prayed Sakura wouldn't discover it and question why he had thoroughly soaked the material.

He headed straight to the bedroom. Sakura hadn't stirred since his absence, the same old blanket was carefully draped across her lithe form, small rises and falls of her chest shifting it slowly further down her body.

He clambered back into the bed and moved to pull the blanket fully over Sakura from where it had fallen. On instinct she turned in towards him, one of her small hands coming up to rest on his chest. His own arms wrapped around her, pulling her flush to him as he sought out her warmth.

Finally he felt restful enough to sleep for the night.

* * *

The next night Kakashi found himself in the exact position he was twenty-four hours before. The rain had yet to abate and the whole of Konoha looked like it was being washed away from the torrential downpour. The memorial was taking a barrage of raindrops that landed with loud plops against its surface then splashing up to hit the Copy-nin with its cast off.

He crouched low to ground with his head bowed. Part of him begged it to stop raining, this way he wouldn't feel the all too familiar ache to come and visit his departed team and in the process leave the very alive and present Sakura to sleep alone.

It always felt like he had to choose one or the other.

A pressure on his shoulder alerted his foggy mind to her presence. Without any effort to cover up what he was doing outside in the middle of the storming night, Kakashi looked up at the freshly bed-risen woman.

Sakura held an umbrella in her hand and tried her best to cover them both from the unrelenting rain. He stood up anyways from his crouch to face her. Part of him was ashamed, like she had discovered him with a mistress. Kakashi knew it wasn't exactly the same but the guilt still weighed heavy nonetheless.

Without words Sakura thrust the umbrella in to one of his hands and ignored him completely to address the stone. She clasped her hands together in prayer.

"Thank you all for watching over Kakashi for as long as you have. Without your continued support he would not be the person he is today." She bowed deeply in respect to the dead.

Painfully so, Kakashi was overwhelmed with the undeniable feelings he had for Sakura.

He couldn't help but reach around her and pull her against his chest in a crushing embrace. She was caught off guard but then quickly responded by placing her own arms around his neck. Kakashi may not be great with words but she understood wanting to feel connected to loved ones. He needed something substantial rather than this cold stone.

Reluctantly he let her go, more afraid of cutting off her air than anything else. Sakura smiled hesitantly and remembered her original purpose of following him through the rain tonight.

"Next time, please bring an umbrella."

…

…

…

He wondered how long she had known about his bad habit.

* * *

A/N: So I started writing a new story because of a random inspiration but I plan to finish this one first before doing anything more with the other.


	15. The Things That Haunt Us

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto but after rummaging around the attic I have found a magical genie lamp so maybe this will be my first wish.

* * *

If it were not for training with Team Gai and specifically with Tenten, Sakura would have been turned into swiss cheese by all the kunai and shuriken her pursuer was throwing.

Sakura leapt from tree to tree narrowly missing the sharped edge weapons aimed at her torso. The man trying to kill her was catching up with each mile of forest she covered and soon he would literally be on her heels.

"You guys better be ready or I swear this target won't last much longer." Sakura hissed into her earpiece.

Regardless of the fact that Sakura served time in ANBU and became the renowned Neo Copy-nin, she still ended up playing bait to capture their target. Sure, no one knew the face behind the mask of her title but it was still annoying to act like an inexperienced Chunin fumbling through the forest.

She gritted her teeth and jumped out of the trees into the previously designated capture spot. Holding her ground in front of a small creak, Sakura waited as the man that had tailed her for over 6 miles dropped in front of her. She finally got her first real look at the target that had been at her back for so long.

Supposedly he was a dangerous S-class criminal that acted as a runner of information from one subversive faction to another. Having the ability to communicate between rebel groups is a considerable advantage over the hidden villages and while they did not like to work together, this was a nuisance that needed to be taken care of. Thus the reason Naruto had deployed herself, Kakashi, and Genma on this assignment.

Sakura sized up the target in front of her and honestly she only thought young and cocky. The man continued to grin from ear to ear as he raked a disgusting look over her body. She desperately wanted to punch his lights out. But he was _so_ very important and had information they needed to extract, so she couldn't do that yet.

"Looks like this is the end of the road." He said in a dark voice.

Great, he's a talker. Sakura cursed her misfortune and hoped her team would be here soon so they could dispatch of the scum of the earth that eyed her like easy prey. He's distracted enough to chase her through the forest without thought that she might have backup. It was a wonder he had never been caught or killed.

"Right. Try saying something less predictable. Perhaps the locations of the men you work for." Sakura spoke sweetly.

Her voice seemed to amuse the man further. He took a step toward her and Sakura followed his movement by taking one step back.

"Scared of me? That's alright because all I really want is to hurt you. Hurt you bad."

She glared and tried to suppress her revulsion at the way his words seemed to reach out and touch her skin. Many men would act this way towards her and some like this creep really got under her skin. At least now she didn't have to resort to seduction to take out her targets.

"You can't hurt me. A poorly thrown kunai doesn't exactly yell danger. But it doesn't matter much because my team has arrived and you are out of luck."

In the surrounding forest, Sakura could make out silver hair and the telltale glint of a senbon. She smiled broadly at no longer having to hold a conversation with him. The man glanced around him and took in the same sight but when he turned back to her there was a smirk on his face.

"Five seconds, Cherry."

She froze in place at the nickname. Without hands signs as an indication, two streams of fire came hurtling towards Sakura at an unbelievable rate. Sakura's eyes widened in shock before her body's reflexes responded by violently twisting around and diving into the water behind her.

The creak as most creaks go wasn't deep enough and she felt the scorching heat of flames lick her back right before her side smacked into a rock protruding from the bed. The pain momentarily engulfed her conscience and Sakura briefly thought that this might be the worst pain she'd ever had the displeasure of feeling and how nice it would be to pass out right now.

But these thoughts ended when she was pulled out of the water and brought back to the reality of the situation. Arms held her up and shifted Sakura until she was slung over a very familiar shoulder.

Kakashi made sure not to place his hands over her back. Before he went into the creak to retrieve her, he saw the fire touch her skin and knew it was serious. Genma had already subdued their target and while he interrogated him, it was up to Kakashi to set up camp and make sure their medic wasn't severely injured.

Sakura watched from Kakashi's back as made his way into the forest. She didn't take her eyes off of the detained man. Genma had him on his front with his hands tied behind his back and suspiciously the senbon was absent from the Jonin's mouth this one time. Sakura paled to think where he had stuck it to start the interrogation.

From underneath her, Sakura felt Kakashi jump up into the tree branches. She took one last glimpse at the two on the ground. The man turned his head at that moment and looked straight at her through the branches. Even caught his eyes sparkled with triumph. Sakura forced herself to look away and shifted her focus on Kakashi as he began to move through the forest.

* * *

After a few miles Kakashi decided that a small area between the large overhanging trees would be as good a spot as any. He was also concerned by the lack of moving on Sakura's part since he picked her up.

He carefully set her down on the ground next to one of the larger tree trunks with her back to the air. She sighed, in pain or exhaustion he couldn't tell. Now up close Kakashi could see the damage done by that fire jutsu. Her back was a mix of dried blood and blisters that invited infection. Sakura chose to look away from Kakashi's probing eyes but even she couldn't ignore him indefinitely.

"How do you want me to help?" He asked.

The pain was blurring into numbness and Sakura couldn't focus her mind. She regretted coming on this mission the instant their target spoke those three words. Things from the past were meant to be kept there. She shouldn't have to be reminded of the things that happened during her ANBU career.

"Sakura."

Kakashi gently shook her shoulder. She banished those thoughts from her mind and went into medic mode.

"Well… I need to remove my shirt but I can't tell if it's burned on."

Sakura waited with bated breath for him to respond and hoped that for once fire defied logic and didn't burn through everything it touched.

"It is."

She sucked in a breath. The only way to remove the material would be to rip it away.

"I guess you know what I need you to do." Sakura joked with a tight lipped smile.

One look at the Copy-nin said he was not amused and Sakura instantly sobered. She tried to ignore the giddy feeling of adrenaline that coursed through her body.

"Sorry it's my nerves. I'll need water to clean the wound as well."

Kakashi nodded and made a few hand signs. With a poof of smoke Uhei, one of his dog summons appeared. He fished out a container from his bag and tossed it to the pup.

"Grab some fresh water from that stream nearby and be careful not to spill or contaminate it." He commanded. Uhei picked up the container with his teeth and quickly took off in the direction of the water source.

From the same bag Kakashi took out rubbing alcohol and some bandages. He set them down carefully next to his side and pulled off his gloves. Sakura focused on the foliage in front of her and idly wondered if there would be new scars added to the ones already there.

"Kakashi you'll need to pull off the shirt in strips. There's no way it will come off in one go. I'll try my best to focus chakra out through my pores, which should stop the skin from coming off with the fabric…I hope." She murmured the last part.

That was the part he was most concerned about, that and he knew how painful this was going to be for her. But there was no choice. If the wound got infected then there would be a lot more problems to deal with later. With that in his mind, Kakashi braced an arm across her shoulder blades to keep her still. Sakura tensed at the feel of his arm and took deep breaths to calm herself.

Without any more buildup, Kakashi grabbed a bit of fabric and pulled back swiftly.

Sakura let out a small cry.

Hearing it killed him.

But he didn't want to pause for a second and soon another strip of fabric came off. This time Sakura only whimpered and somehow managed to keep up a steady stream of chakra to her back. A few more times this continued until the wounds were completely bare and fabric had piled up.

Sakura remained perfectly still and focused on breathing through the pain even as tears pooled in her eyes. Her only saving grace was the chakra providing relief from the pain but she would need to conserve it soon.

There was a soft patter of paws approaching them and Sakura turned her head toward Uhei as he set the dish of water next to Kakashi's leg. He came up real close to Sakura's face and rubbed his nose against her cheek then plopped down on his stomach next to her. She raised her hand to pet his head.

"Such a good boy. If you're around later when I'm better I'll give you a treat."

The ninkin barked in acknowledgement before settling down. Kakashi watched her from the corner of his eye while he began the process of cleaning the wounds.

"You know you aren't supposed to fee the dogs or treat them like pets." He commented before sweeping a damp cloth down her back.

Sakura shivered at the cool feeling of water on her bare skin. The outside temperature dropped with the sun on the horizon.

"But they're always so helpful and of course strong. And you spoil them all the time by letting them sleep in bed with you." She reminded him.

Kakashi continued to clean the wounds without responding to her barb. The skin was already looking much better since the initial injury and because Sakura's chakra had it already starting to scab over. With a little more healing there was sure to be no scarring. Kakashi felt relieved.

"Should I dress the wound?"

"No. It needs air to heal." Sakura replied.

"The sun is almost completely gone. It'll be freezing soon." He stated, worried about her wellbeing.

"If we set up camp quickly and a fire, I will be fine for the rest of the night and by morning the burns will be gone."

Sakura smiled and proceeded to sit up. As she moved a pain radiated down her side and spread towards her chest. She doubled over and grunted from the unexpected jolt. Kakashi was by her side and supporting her in a second. He peered at the right side she clutched with one hand and saw the almost completely dark blue bruise covering a large expanse of skin.

"Sakura, your side."

She also looked at her right side in shock by the damage present there. If it wasn't for the burns on her back she would have felt this sooner. The dive into the water had to be the cause and from the pain of it she fractured a rib.

"Damn, I can't believe I didn't notice it." She reprimanded herself.

Slightly embarrassed, Sakura brought her hand to her side and began mending the injured rib. Kakashi remained seated behind her, supporting her weight to keep her sitting up right. Sakura focused on her healing and tried her best to forget that she was topless on a mission with Kakashi.

They had been together for only four months and this was the first time they had been assigned a mission together. Naruto only allowed this because it was an A-verging-on-S-rank mission. Otherwise the Hokage was a stickler for the rule about people involved not working on the same team.

So despite their outgoing personalities this was very new territory for the both of them. It was discussed before the mission that at all times they would be professional and not acknowledge being anything other than teammates. If Sakura was her younger self, she doubted she could keep composure for the sake of the mission.

But she knew how easily an enemy could use a personal relationship against you. Or sometimes they just broke you down physically before delving into the psychological.

When the bruise finally became a yellow-greenish colour, Sakura stopped her healing. This would be enough so she didn't waste chakra and let natural healing take over.

"Wow Sakura, you're looking perky." The seductive voice echoed in front of her.

Her hands flew to cover her chest and she glared daggers as Genma appeared out of the trees. There was a senbon back in his mouth and he didn't look at all like he interrogated and disposed of a criminal. Sakura tore her eyes away from his figure to look around for something to cover her front. Unsurprisingly, there was nothing in sight, at least until she eyed her pack nestled on Genma's shoulder.

Discarding her previous embarrassment, Sakura jumped up to her feet and appeared in front of Genma before he could mentally prepare himself. Uhei, roused by the movement around him got up with Sakura and followed obediently behind her.

"Genma how sweet of you to personally deliver my stuff. Now if you'll just hand it over." Sakura used her overly sweet and menacing voice reserved for people like him and Naruto.

Genma smiled happily at the angry kunoichi barely able to cover her chest. Nothing he quite enjoyed more than a topless flustered woman.

"And why would I possibly want to do that Sakura?" He teased.

Uhei growled at his tone and Sakura wanted to bathe him in treats for being protective of her. She glanced back at Kakashi who hadn't moved an inch since Genma showed up and didn't even seem concerned that his overly friendly friend had seen her topless. She was suddenly wishing to be in a certain Kazekage's office instead in this similar situation.

But then again Sakura wasn't weak and certainly not afraid of stupid Genma. She stepped up close to him, almost enough that her body touched his and with the hand not covering her front, touched his cheek. Sakura leaned her mouth toward his ear as she caressed his face.

"If you don't stop looking at my breasts and if you don't give me my bag, I'm going to take your favourite play toy and use it to make an unwanted piercing on your other favourite play toy." She threatened.

Sakura pulled away to smile at the frightened shinobi. His hand moved on autopilot and handed over her bag immediately. She graciously accepted it and rummaged around before pulling out one of her long sleeved shirts and tying it around her front. This way her wound wouldn't be covered but her important bits were.

"There we go. And now-"

Sakura swayed on her feet as the chakra drain from healing hit her in a wave. Jokes aside Genma went to steady her only to be cut off by Kakashi already doing just that.

"I'm fine. I just overdid it a bit with my chakra."

She tried to wave Kakashi off but he insisted she at least sit down. Grudgingly, she deferred to her superior and did as told.

"Genma start a fire. Uhei stay here and make sure Sakura doesn't do anything to make her condition worse. I'm gonna go hunt down dinner." He doled out the orders automatically.

Kakashi took off into trees, leaving the other two in each other's company. Although Genma was a pain in the ass most of the time he still took his job seriously and set about making the fire. Within minutes a warm heat filled the small space they occupied and Sakura was grateful for not having to do it herself. Uhei settled next to her when she moved to the fire and idly she began to pet his fur. Genma followed suit and sat next to her and made sure to keep his eyes at face level.

"I'm assuming since you're the medic that you'll be fine?"

"The only thing hurt is my pride. I would've liked the chance to pay him back." She grumbled, referring to a completely different mission involving that man.

"After I was done, there wasn't much left to work with." He stated then pulled out a cigarette. Secretly the thought of Genma carefully using a senbon on the man's smirking face excited her.

"Did he give anything away?"

With Genma's shake of the head, Sakura cursed the already dead man. The man didn't lie, he did hurt her, bad. And months later she acted as bait and again found herself being violated by his eyes and probably his thoughts. This should've at least earned them some tidbit of info. Then again maybe Genma's interrogation technique wasn't very good.

"So the mission was a failure." She stated more than asked.

"You of so little faith, of course I didn't fail."

Genma pulled a scroll from his vest and chucked it towards her. As Sakura unravelled it, Kakashi arrived back at camp with fish in hand. He set about putting the food on spits and laying them above the fire.

"The boy was cocky enough to think it unnecessary to seal the scrolls he was delivering. Damn amateurs." He let out a slow exhale of smoke.

Sakura read the scroll quickly and was surprised by the amount of details it contained. He worked for some powerful people but she already knew that quite well.

"We may not have got loads of information but we have something important here and best of all we disposed of their runner."

She nodded along but it didn't feel like a victory. Not to her. Not this time.

Kakashi watched Sakura's expression change from surprise to distant as Genma assured that their mission was a success. He didn't want to mention it because he knew how capable Sakura was, but she froze in front of the enemy and that's the reason she was injured. Nothing would come of telling her that fact, something she probably was already well aware of. The thing that he was more concerned about was why she froze when the target called her 'Cherry'.

He continued tending to the fish to not appear overly observant of her. After a few minutes he pulled the spits off and handed one to Genma and Sakura. She took one look at the fish then passed it to Uhei who greedily devoured it.

"You should eat." He insisted.

She smiled kindly before shaking her head. He knew it wasn't an honest gesture.

"No thanks, with this injury I think it would be too painful to eat right now."

Sakura made the lame excuse and knew it wouldn't fool Kakashi, he was the master of poor excuses after all. With the mission coming to a close and her adrenaline high long gone, a small ball of anxiety was forming inside her. She really wanted not be here with him because it made everything worse and she couldn't control the panic rising in her mind.

Kakashi made no effort to pry or question why she was lying, instead he ate his dinner and talked about the trip home and sending word ahead of what they learned.

Eventually, Genma left camp to take first watch and Sakura fell asleep immediately to rest as much as she could before taking watch after him.

* * *

The splintered wood was a reminder of where she was and that she was alive. It scraped her skin when she moved even the slightest bit and if she focused on that little tug of pain, really focused, then she could drown out the other pains. She could forget about the chakra inhibitors and the way they used her forehead protector as a blindfold. Everything else could be pushed out of her mind except that she was sitting in an uncomfortable chair.

But her will power wasn't enough to escape from reality when she heard his voice through the open door.

"Five seconds, Cherry."

It was said with excitement and smugness from the guard at the door. And it was always followed by the echoing sound of footsteps making their way toward her prison cell. In her head she counted down the time, trying to steel herself mentally against whatever was to come.

Part of her mind, the part that was losing touch with sanity, thought about how the guard knew she had pink hair and not the black it was currently dyed. Or maybe it was only a nickname used to demean and belittle her. It didn't really matter she supposed and perhaps that's why the insane part of her mind was thinking about it instead of the footsteps that had stopped outside the door.

If you became good enough, a shinobi could detach themselves from their body for a period of time. But Sakura wasn't good enough or maybe because as a medic feeling anything was considered better than nothing at all. It didn't matter. All thoughts flew out of her mind when she felt the cool tip of a scalpel on her skin.

"ANBU-san, it's been a waste of time and this pretty flesh to still be keeping silent. So let me say it again, if you tell me something about your village then I would be glad to let you leave. Even though it's in less pieces than you came in with."

Sakura could almost imagine her captor smile as he said the last sentence. She didn't need to see his face to know that right now it looked dirty and sickening. Silence deafened the room because staying silent was the best thing you could do when taken as a prisoner. At least that's what the academy had taught her. But all too quickly she realized it didn't matter if you talked or kept quiet, no matter what you were always hurt.

It was no surprise when the scalpel cut with measured force around her right knee, as if he were trying to carve out the bone. There was no point holding back screams, they tore through her throat, almost as if the sound itself wanted to get far away from the agony.

"Tell me why you were watching this base?"

Honestly after the fourth day of torture Sakura had resolved to tell them all they wanted to know in exchange for her life. To stop the deep cuts on her arms and back and the drugs they poured into her system.

She felt ashamed for having broken so quickly but to her credit she hadn't said a single thing. In her mind, Sakura knew they wouldn't let her live once she told them and that was the only reason she had remained silent.

But that didn't stop her interrogator from coming back every day and finding some part of her body he hadn't already cut apart. Without a viable escape option, she knew that with the amount of blood loss only another day, if that, stood between death and her.

Knowing what was coming gave her a weird sense of calm and confidence. Sakura thought of how she would miss Naruto and that her greatest regret was the promise he made her when they were genin.

The man grew impatient and stabbed straight through the inner muscle of her thigh, mere centimeters from the femoral artery. She managed to bite back a cry by grinding her teeth together.

She hoped Naruto would be able to clean up the remains of Konoha's history and be the only Hokage who didn't keep secrets from the citizens. And also put a cap on the amount of dangerous missions Kakashi did.

When her thoughts turned to the Copy-nin, her calm began to slip and her ability to cope with dying on these bastards terms slipped with it. Would he think poorly of her having been caught by the enemy? For not escaping? Maybe if an afterlife existed for her she could properly explain everything. That she endured the hours of torture without uttering a single word and how every time Sakura thought of him she desperately wondered what Kakashi would do in her situation.

But she knew the answer to that.

"The reason I came out here…was because…I got lost…on the path of life."

For the first time since she had been captured Sakura spoke and for the first time she cried.

Sakura opened her eyes slowly, tears still streamed down her face with the last dredges of her dreams. But dreams eventually are forgotten, it was memories that you couldn't escape from.

The flickering fire in the camp reminded her that those memories were in the past. The calm breathing coming from Kakashi asleep beside the fire comforted her haggard thoughts and raw feelings.

A whoosh of air almost smothered the fire as Genma flew into camp from his shift on watch. Sakura hastily wiped away her remaining tears. Slapping on her medic's pouch she got up from her bed roll and shot off towards the perimeter of their camp before Genma could report.

He sat down on his own sleeping area and lit a cigarette. After a long first drag he released a string of curling smoke toward the night sky.

"She has ghosts. We both know how bad it is to have something at your back that you can't escape from."

Genma didn't need to look at his old friend to know that he was awake and listening. It was up to Kakashi what he did to help her and depending on what he did would show how much he actually cared about the medic. Genma could easily believe that Sakura loved his best friend but he couldn't say the same for Kakashi based on how long and how well he has known him.

He wasn't going to pretend to understand their relationship, what he cared for was whether they were happy and still strong shinobi together.

Genma smothered the rest of his smoke on the ground and flopped down to rest. In ten minutes, he had relaxed to the point of sleep and just before he dozed off he heard his companion get up and follow the direction Sakura had taken.

* * *

Chakra was life. Sakura always felt that way and as she grew to understand all the intricacies of this energy, the more she believed that statement.

She sat cross legged in a tree and released chakra into the large plant and soon she felt everything as an extension of her own body. This was the secret to her ability to copy techniques. Every jutsu required chakra, so theoretically having perfect chakra control and the proper training could allow you to copy other ninja's techniques.

For her with no bloodline limit or being born with a Jinchuriki, this was a unique ability and unexpected from a regular shinobi. But the technique still had downsides. Depending on the jutsu, large amounts of chakra were sometimes needed. That's why she limited copied jutsus to defensive only or in worst case scenarios.

Using what she learned from Gaara's sand jutsu, Sakura moved and stilled the leaves of the tree she sat on. It was a relaxing feeling. Like she alone could control nature and be the wind.

An ebb in her chakra alerted her to a person's presence at the base of the tree. She knew that chakra well. Breaking her concentration, she pulled back her chakra from the tree. Peering down below at the ground, Kakashi's silver hair made an identifiable outline in the pitch black night.

"Your watch is not for a few more hours. Unless you're here because you feel bad about me taking the middle shift?" Sakura joked.

When an answer was not forthcoming, she slipped off the branch and landed in front of Kakashi. His covered face was barely seen in the dark but she could just make out where his mask ended and where the one solitary eye stood out. And his brow was scrunched, something she always took to mean he was worried.

"What is it?" Her voice serious.

"There's something wrong. I thought it was because of your injuries. But it's not. The target, he said 'Five seconds, Cherry' and you froze. Why?"

Sakura wasn't prepared for a confrontation with him about her actions. She got injured but she took care of the wounds and they were still able to complete the mission, he had no reason to be asking about that other stuff. However, he was still her superior and she had to report to him like any other subordinate. She took a step back to maintain a professional distance.

"I apologize for not maintaining composure, Captain. I ran into our target before on another mission. Unfortunately, my interactions with him were unresolved."

Kakashi hated her calm and detached voice. She answered his question but he hadn't meant for it to be in a subordinate capacity. The step back she took he made up for with one of his own. To show he was here for her not as team leader but as himself, Kakashi pulled down his mask. When it was on he could never be truly honest or dare ask for her to be. It was a barrier for him as a shinobi, an elusive and lazy person, but without it he was only a man.

"Sakura, you can tell me. Whatever it is."

A lump formed in her throat. His face was comforting and definitely unexpected out here in the forest. She felt compelled to tell him everything. There was nothing she wanted to keep from this man. But her heart started beating double time as shame and fear took over her mind. She ran a shaky hand through her hair then rubbed her arm in an attempt to warm herself as a cold dread came over her.

"Six months into ANBU and I hadn't made a single mistake, every mission I accepted ended in success. As a result, I was over confident and aiming big. I went after a group of S-rank rogues and instead of reporting back to Kazekage and arranging a large group assault, I went in alone. That's when I was caught."

Sakura's eye shifted towards the ground before she told the next part.

"I wasn't prepared at all. They were able to trap me and completely shut off access to my chakra. I knew what to expect as a prisoner but really…I would never be ready for what came. They blindfolded me, so I didn't see the man that tortured me but I always knew when he was coming. Our target he was the guard there, he would give me five second warnings before the interrogator arrived and then he would call me that name." Her voice shook as it came out.

"I tried my best to resist and didn't say anything. But by the fourth day I was ready to give in. What they had done and planned on doing to me was too much. I wanted to tell them everything, about me, about Konoha. There was nothing I wouldn't say to have them stop." She whispered the last part.

Hearing this information, Kakashi was torn between anger with her for giving away things about their village and anger with those people that had tortured her endlessly. The latter quickly won over the former though. How could he blame her in that situation or anyone who had to endure the cruelty dealt to a prisoner?

"So you told them everything?" His voice matching hers in octave.

Sakura looked up at his face finally and saw pity there. Anger bubbled up at being pitied, like it was inevitable that Sakura would give in. He could yell at her and be disappointed in her but she refused to be pitied.

"No. For almost two weeks I didn't say a single word. I knew even if I talked those promises of my freedom were lies. They would just dispose of me quicker and I selfishly wanted to live as long as possible even if it meant torture every day. But the anger and hopelessness I felt continued to grow and I snapped...I ended up telling them I had gotten lost on the path of life." She smiled grimly at her comment.

Kakashi, at a loss for words and confused beyond them remained silent as she continued to talk.

"Gaara sent out a team when I didn't check in. When they found the base everyone jumped ship but Temari was able to take down the majority of them. She found me in the basement, blindfolded, restrained, and close to death. I was rushed to Suna and eventually my wounds healed and the entire incident became a classified file that the Kazekage never told Naruto about."

He didn't understand why she was upset. By not telling them anything under duress Sakura had gone above and beyond her job as a Hidden Leaf ninja. It was not an easy thing to have shinobi risk their lives absolutely for their village.

"You managed to survive and didn't give in to the torture. Sakura, you did everything right."

Her eyes blazed flames and she forgot all about being quiet.

"I didn't! I became a traitor. It may not have been in words but in my heart I betrayed the village, I betrayed Naruto…I betrayed you."

Chakra flared around her fists and for the first time in a while she felt weak and wanted to prove she wasn't by hitting something. Hard. After that incident, Sakura had vowed never to let those kinds of thoughts in again, no matter the circumstance. But the guilt of the first and last betrayal refused to leave.

Kakashi stood still, unsure of how he should help her. He should not dare to touch her when she couldn't control her chakra. What could he say to her even? That it wasn't a betrayal? It was but it didn't hold the same meaning as going to the enemy and telling them everything.

He leaned in toward her and extended his hand around her small frame. Sakura resisted as Kakashi pulled her close to him in an uncharacteristic display of intimacy. His body exuded heat but she wasn't about to be comforted into silence.

"You can hit me if you want and fight me if you have to but just listen to me for a bit first."

Her body remained tense but she stopped fighting against his hold.

"I can't blame you for what you felt. I've been in that situation before."

Sakura eyes squeezed shut and knew the time he was referring to. Recently, she had discovered two long-since healed knife wounds on the back of Kakashi's ankles. Like most of the scars he carried there was a story behind them and she asked to hear that one.

Every shinobi makes a life or death mistake in their career, sometimes several of them. Kakashi had been captured by several S-class ninja's hoping to gather intel on Konoha from a young boy who knew many of its secrets. They sliced the tendons in his ankles partly to keep him from escaping, partly to get him to talk, and partly for the sick pleasure of breaking him down.

She was reminded of her own experience when Kakashi had told the entire mission from start to finish without reservation or any other strong emotions. At first anger filled her at hearing how truly disgusting people can be and to a teenager no less. However, Sakura felt great admiration for her partner, the infamous Copy-nin, who had survived torture. He was noble where she was weak.

Kakashi pulled back from her, their eyes met and he tried to convey what he wanted her to realize about herself and him.

"Sakura, listen to me. True strength comes at the cost of being broken a little."

Silence.

A tear splashed against her cheek.

"But I'm so broken…" She whispered.

His thumb smoothed away the moisture from her face. The same hand caressed her cheek with his rough palm.

"No, love, you're very much strength."

"Kakashi!" Sakura vaulted towards his chest, his arms caught her small form and kept her close to him.

Her slender hands tightened around his flak jacket. She knew he was right, of course he was. For the pain she endured, Sakura became a different person. And not just from that one time.

She began to talk fast and almost incoherently.

"I'm sorry! I just couldn't escape it. The room I was held in, the feel of the chair I was tied to. When the cold metal of a scalpel was drawn across the skin. And his voice. Taunting me, scaring me for what was about to come. I wanted to forget! But you never forget."

In Sakura's past everything that happened contributed to the kunoichi she was. Knowing this it became easier to let go of her pain. She had endured.

Sakura's hands on his jacket pushed back slightly allowing her some room to breathe and let the last of her emotions run their course. Deep breaths helped her emotionally and physically exhausted self calm down. Finally, she found resolve.

Kakashi remained silent and chose to watch her actions. Darkness made it difficult to really see her and without the use of the Sharingan, but he could see the subtle puffiness of the skin under her eyes that indicated her tears. The cool air came out in long puffs from Sakura as she forcefully took long breaths. She was only wearing the long shirt tied around her front from earlier, she must be cold.

He thought of how much she changed. Shadows or remnants of her past self remained but were altered. Her smiles a little more guarded but sometimes when only Kakashi and Sakura were together she would smile like she had when she was sixteen. Tinged by only the briefest pains but full of hope, it remained the only thing he coveted more than the woman himself.

"I'm in love with you."

Sakura froze mid breath and her eyes widened a fraction. The gears in her head turned at a snail's pace with trying to process his words. Then it hit her.

"You bastard! Don't say that kind of thing now!" She yelled.

Kakashi could only muster a smile in response. Despite her words, a pretty blush covered Sakura's cheeks and the smile he so loved was barely concealed by her.

* * *

A/N: I always figured this story had to have at one mission centered chapter and so there it is.


End file.
